A Rose by Any Other Name
by Girl29
Summary: An insecure Bella meets Edward Cullen in an online chat room. Sparks fly, but when he wants to meet her, she pretends to be someone else. EXBXR and Em triangle. All Human. Rated T for now but may change. Please R
1. Chapter 1

**Disclainer: **I don't own any of the Characters in this story.

* * *

It was a typical Saturday night. I sat at my computer desk, working on my English homework while my roommate Rosalie, tried on every piece of clothing she owned in search of the perfect outfit to wear for her night out. She settled on a sexy white tri-top romper, that barely gave her more coverage that a swimsuit (link in profile). She completed her outfit with 4-inch silver pumps and hoop earrings.

"How do I look?" She twirled around before grabbing her keys and purse off her bed.

"Wow, I like it. Everything looks good on you Rose." Rosalie was stunning. She had wavy blond hair, blue eyes, and a body that would make any supermodel jealous.

"Are you sure you don't want to come with me to DV8 tonight?"

"No, that's ok. I still have a lot of homework I need to get done." Not to mention that next to her, I felt like a prepubescent 12 year old boy. A night out with Rosalie would equate to me sitting alone at the bar, while she spent the night dancing with beautiful strangers and chugging down free drinks.

"Alright then. See you in the morning." She took one last glance in the mirror, and then she left.

It felt good to be alone. I liked spending time with Rose, but I don't know how much longer I could listen to her talk about clothes, and parties and boys. Rosalie was one of the smartest people I know. she was a sophomore, like me, majoring in communications. At times though, she could just be a little shallow.

I finished my paper in no time. It was only 9:30. Instead of sticking to my usual routine, which entailed climbing into bed with a book and reading until I fell asleep, I decided to surf around on the internet.

I went to a couple of chat rooms that weren't very stimulating. I mostly got messages from guys looking for an easy hook-up. _Sorry, not interested_. I decided to try my luck with the university chat room. It was pretty empty. I followed a couple of conversations that talked about the football season and the student body elections next week. Nothing too interesting. I looked over at the clock. I had wasted a good hour, might as well call It a night.

Ding Instant message from _Thatkindofguy. _

Oh, why not.

I accepted the message.

Thatkindofguy_: _Hello.

JaneDoe007_: _Hi.

Thatkindofguy_: _Are you as bored with this room as I am.

JaneDoe007: Yeah. Just a little bit.

Thatkindofguy:only a little….

JaneDoe007: Ok. A lot. I was actually about to log out when I got your message.

Thatkindofguy: Aren't you glad I caught you

JaneDoe007: hmm…..not sure yet. You could be a deranged serial killer, posing as a college student.

ThatKindofguy: Oh, come on. Don't you trust me? ;)

JaneDoe007: I don't even know you.

ThatKindofguy: Well, what do you want to know? Ask me anything?

JaneDoe007: Ok. What is a young, I presume single, college guy, doing at home on the internet on a Saturday night?

ThatKindofguy: You presume correctly. I am single. I just started grad school this semester. I'm working towards getting my medical degree. It's a tough program, doesn't leave much time for a social life. In the end it will be worth it though.

JaneDoe007: So you're a grad student huh? That must make you 22-23? I'm impressed. It's not easy to get into the medical program here. You must be a smart cookie ;)

ThatKindofguy: 22. And yes, I was very lucky that they chose me for the program. What about you?

JaneDoe007: Oh. I'm a journalism major. I'm a sophomore. I just turned 20 in September. I'm sure luck had nothing to do with you getting into the program ;)

ThatKindofguy: Thanks. So…what are you doing home on a Saturday night? Shouldn't you have plans with your boyfriend or be out with your girls tonight?

JaneDoe007: No. I don't have a boyfriend. I don't date much. I'm here on an academic scholarship and can't afford to lose focus. I actually have only had one boyfriend my whole life. We broke up my senior year of high school. As for the club hopping with the girls, I'll take a pass. That's really not my thing.

ThatKindofguy: I see. So what is "your thing."

JaneDoe007: Hey! I thought I was supposed to be asking all the questions "My thing" is I love to read. I could spend all day at the library and never get tired of it. And I like watching old romantic movies. Cuddling up on my couch with a cup of hot chocolate, watching Audrey Hepburn and Gregory Peck fall in love in Roman Holiday would be perfect right now.

ThatKindofguy: Would it still be perfect if I were here to share it with you.

JaneDoe007: Yeah. I don't think I would mind you being here at all.

ThatKindofguy: I wouldn't mind either. I couldn't image a better way to spend my evening.

JaneDoe007: If you could be doing anything right now, what would it be?

ThatKindofguy: I would be here now, with you, doing exactly what I'm doing now.

JaneDoe007: Oh, I bet you say that to all the girls.

ThatKindofguy: Nope. Only one.

JaneDoe007: Really? And who would that be?

ThatKindofguy: You silly girl.

JaneDoe007: I think you're feeding me a line. You can't tell me there isn't anything you wouldn't change.

ThatKindofguy: Yes. Now that I think of it, there is one thing I would change.

JaneDoe007: What's that?

ThatKindofguy: I wish I could be there with you in person. So you can hear the sincerity in my words. So you can look into my eyes and know that the things I tell you are true. No games, no ulterior motives.

JaneDoe007: Please don't take this the wrong way. You sound like a great guy. That's why I don't understand, why are you single?

ThatKindofguy: To be honest, I haven't been single very long. I dated someone for a year and a half. We broke up a couple months ago.

JaneDoe007: Can I ask what happened?

ThatKindofguy: Yeah. I though she was the one. I was going to ask her to marry me. That night I was going to propose I should have been working late. They let me leave early, so I picked up dinner and went straight home to our apartment. I didn't think she would be home yet. I wanted to surprise her, make sure everything was perfect. Imagine my surprise when I came home and found her rolling around on the couch with another guy. She wanted to work things out, but I couldn't. I couldn't trust her anymore after that.

JaneDoe007: I'm so sorry. I shouldn't have asked.

ThatKindofguy: It's ok. It was very hard at first. But day by day, it got a little easier. I know now that she wasn't the right one for me. If she loved me the way I thought she did, it wouldn't have come to that.

JaneDoe007: you're absolutely right. You deserve so much better.

ThatKindofguy: Thank you. If it's ok with you, can I ask you your real name? You don't have to tell me if you don't want to.

JaneDoe007: It's Isabella, but you can call me just Bella.

ThatKindofguy: Very nice to meet you Bella. I'm Edward.

JaneDoe007: I'm happy to meet you Edward.

ThatKindofguy: Bella….

JaneDoe007: Hmm….

ThatKindofguy: I really like you.

JaneDoe007: you really mean that?

ThatKindofguy: Yes. I'd like to talk to you again, if that's ok.

JaneDoe007: That would be great. Same time tomorrow?

ThatKindofguy: without a doubt.

JaneDoe007: It's getting late. I should go.

ThatKindofguy: Ok. Goodnight.

JaneDoe007: Bye

ThatKindofguy has logged off.

JaneDoe007 has logged off.

I hopped out of the chair, ran across the room and jumped into my bed. I buried my face in my pillow and screamed. I couldn't believe this was happening. Tonight had been amazing. I really liked Edward. He seemed like such a sweet guy, smart, and compassionate. I had never talked to anyone like him. I drifted off to sleep, excited for what tomorrow would bring.

* * *

Rosalie was still sleeping when I woke up the next morning. I went over to my computer to check my email. 1 new message from ThatKindofguy. I eagerly clicked on the message.

Good Morning sweet Bella. I know we agreed to talk again tonight, but I couldn't wait that long. I apologize if this seems to forward. I've never met anyone like you before. You seem so smart, and caring. Truly one of a kind. Since we talked my every thought has occupied with you. I hope to speak to you again soon. I will be here, waiting for you.

"Wow! What is this?!" Rosalie's voice boomed from behind me.

I gasped and nearly jumped out of my skin. I hadn't noticed I was that engrossed in reading my email until now.

"Holy Crow Rosalie, you scared me! Are you trying to give me a heart attack?"

She grabbed a chair from her computer desk and moved it next to mine. "Did you meet a guy?" She inquired a sly smile on her face.

"No, were just talking. I don't even really know him." But I wanted to. I wanted to get to know every part of him.

"How was your night Rose?" If I knew there was one thing Rose loved more than prying in my personal life, it was talking about her own. I hoped to distract her enough that she would forget about the email.

"Ok" She scooted closer to me and grabbed my hand in hers. "You know Emmett Mccarty?"

"Emmett Mccarty, the football player?!"

"Mmm Hmm. He asked me to go out with him next weekend."

"Oh, Rose. Don't get me wrong, he's cute and all, But I don't know. How many people do you know that take 3 years to finish their senior year of college?"

"Well he redshirted his first year here, so technically he has only been a senior for two. Besides he is really focused on his football career. He could have gone pro his sophomore year, but decided to finish college first so he will have something to fall back on."

"Oh Rosalie, always the loyal Sepford wife." I joked sarcastically.

"Shut up." She let go of my hand and pushed me over. "I really like him."

"So I guess that means I'm spending another Saturday night alone huh?"

"Not that you'll be disappointed. So….. tell me about this guy you've been talking to. That email was pretty intense." Shoot. My distraction didn't go over as well as I thought.

"Were just friends. He seems like a really sweet guy."

"Sound's like somebody's got a crush on someone. Hey, maybe we can double next weekend."

"Maybe?"

I hadn't given much thought to actually meeting him. It was a scary thought. Would he want to take things further, beyond our instant messages. I don't know if I'm ready for that. Or even worse, what if we did meet and then he decided he didn't like me. I don't know if I would be able to take that kind of rejection.

"Well think about it. I'm gonna hop in the shower and head over to the rec center."

"Ok."

Rosalie went into the bathroom and closed the door. I closed out my email and logged in to my instant messenger.

JaneDoe007: Are you here?

ThatKindofguy: I missed you.

JaneDoe007: I missed you too.

Thatkindofguy: I couldn't stop thinking about you last night.

JaneDoe007: I could tell. I got the memo.

Thatkindofguy: Oh, the email. I hoped you wouldn't mind. I know we agreed to talk tonight.

JaneDoe007: yeah. No. I didn't mind. It was actually a really nice surprise. I really like you too.

We chatted for hours about our favorite movies, favorite songs, and our families. Edward was an only child, like me. He grew up in Chicago. He only moved to Tucson this year after getting accepted to the UA medical school.

JaneDoe007: I'll have to show you the city sometime. I've only lived in Tucson two years, but next to you, that makes me an expert.

Thatkindofguy: I would love to. How about this weekend?

JaneDoe007: Wait are you serious?

Thatkindofguy: Without a doubt. I really want to meet you Bella. Can I see you this weekend?

Shoot. What have I gotten myself into? I quickly tried to weigh the pro's and con's of accepting a date with Edward this weekend. In the end, none of it mattered. I cared a lot about Edward and didn't want to disappoint him.

JaneDoe007: Ok. How about Saturday night. Do you know where Sharks is? We could meet there at 9?

ThatKindofguy: Yes. I know where it is. 9 o clock sounds good.

JaneDoe007: Ok, It's a date. I'll see you then.

ThatKindofguy: Wait!

Sending file……..

A picture uploaded to my messenger. I handsome young man wearing a grey T-shirt and jeans, stood in front of a silver Volvo, leaning against the hood of the car. He had messy bronze hair and the most stunning green eyes. He was seriously _hot! _He looked like he just walked off the pages of a Calvin Klein ad.

JaneDoe007: wow is that you?

Thatkindofguy: Yes. That picture was taken this year. My parents bought me the car as a graduation gift. What do you look like Bella?

Oh crap. There was no way I could ever measure up to him. He was amazingly gorgeous, and I was…..well….mousy and boring.

JaneDoe007: Does that really matter?

Thatkindofguy: Lol. No. It doesn't matter to me what you look like. I just need to know how to find you on Saturday.

_Yeah right!_

JaneDoe007: um…yeah. Hold on I'll send you a picture.

I clicked into my documents and looked through my picture files. I had tons of pictures of Renee and Charlie. A few of my friends from high school. The only picture I actually had with me in it was the one Renee had taken of me and Rosalie when we first moved into the dorm. I sent it to Edward.

Thatkindofguy: Got it. Which one are you?

JaneDoe007: guess.

Thatkindofguy: Umm….the blonde?

JaneDoe007: you're right.

I know I shouldn't have misled him. But I didn't know what else to do. The guy was a god and already, he had chosen Rosalie. If anyone had the option of me or Rosalie, the choice would always be her.

Thatkindofguy: You are very beautiful.

_I know._ Rosalie would always be beautiful. And I would always be the plain best friend.

JaneDoe007: Thank you. Look Edward. I have to go. See you next weekend.

Thatkindofguy: until then.

JaneDoe007: Bye Edward.

I spent all next week avoiding Rosalie. I didn't know how to explain to her what I had done. I had unintentionally set her up on a date with a guy that I had a crush on. It was Thursday before she became savy to the fact that I was ignoring her. She confronted me that night as we were getting ready for bed.

"Bella what's been going on with you?"

"Nothing Rose, everything's fine." Gosh, I was such a bad liar.

"You're lying! You've been ignoring me all week!"

I climbed onto my bed and hugged my knees to my chest.

"I'm so so sorry Rose. There's something I need to tell you, I just don't know how."

She sat next to me on the bed. "What is it? You know you can tell me anything?"

I explained to her the conversation I had with Edward a couple of nights ago, how we had made plans to meet on Saturday, and how when he asked me to send him a picture, I let him think that I was her.

"Oh No, Bella! Why would you do that?"

"I don't know. I guess I just wanted him to like me."

"You have to fix this."

"I don't know how."

"Come on, we'll think of something."


	2. Chapter 2

**Disclaimer: **I do not own any of the Character's in this story. The club they go to is fictional.

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A/N: Thanks to everyone who reviewed the last chapter :) Links to Bella and Rosalie's outfits for this chapter, and Rosalie's clubbin outfit from chapter one are in my profile.

* * *

Saturday night came sooner than I wanted it too. I avoided talking to Edward online, but I did send him a couple of emails to let him know we were still on for tonight.

Rose and I had come up with a plan. We would meet Edward togerther Sparxx night club. Rosalie and I would explain to him that it had been a big mistake. Emmett was going to meet Rosalie there at 9:00p, at which by that time, the situation with Edward should be resolved.

She would have her guy, and I would have mine. We would all laugh about it and have a fun double date.

Rosalie once again looked like she stepped of the pages of a fashion magazine. She wore a fire-engine red satin trimmed v neck blouson dress with black stilettos and silver hoop earrings. She pulled her long blond hair up into an elegant ponytail.

"Bella its 8:30, hurry up and get dressed."

"I am dressed." I thought I looked cute. I pulled on a light grey deep v neck t-shirt over a pair of dark denim jeans.

"No, honey." She shook her head at me before pulling a purple spaghetti strap camisole out of her closet. "Here, lose the sports bra and put this on."

"It's too big. I'm going to be popping out of that shirt."

"That's the point Bella."

I changed into the shirt, and, at Rosalie's request strapped on a pair of wedged heels.

We were only about 10 minutes late. I spotted Edward right away. He was leaning against a table, scanning the crowd. God he looked even more amazing in person.

I squeezed Rosalie's hand in excitement.

"I don't know if I can do this." I was starting to lose my nerve.

"It will be ok. Come on." She pulled me with her over to the table where Edward was standing.

"Hi!" Rosalie extended a hand out to Edward.

"Bella?" A huge grin spread across his face. My self esteem took another hit just seeing the way he looked at Rose. This was a terrible idea. Why did I ever think this would work.

"Uh, yeah" Rosalie responded. She grabbed my arm and pulled me in between her and Edward "And _this_ is my friend…"

"Chloe." I interjected. "I'm Chloe." Rosalie scowled at me.

"Nice to meet you Chloe." Edward took my hand in his. A simple enough gesture, but as he shook my hand and looked into my eyes, all time seemed to stop.

The warmth of his fingers wrapped around mine created a burning sensation in my palm that radiated through my bones, causing my whole arm to tingle. Too soon, he released his grasp. I wondered if he felt it too.

"So…why don't you two talk? Chloe has this funny story to tell you. I'm going to go get a drink."

_NO! _She was not going to do this to me right now. We were supposed to tell him together.

Before I could protest, Rose was lost in the crowd, leaving me alone to face Edward.

_Coward. _Glad to see Rose was putting that fake ID of hers to good use.

Edward shoved his hands in his pockets and rocked back and forth from the back of his heels to the balls of his feet.

"So…?" He drug out after about 30 seconds of awkward silence.

So." I repeated.

"What is it?"

"What is what?" I asked confused.

"The story?" He spoke the words slowly, deliberately; as if he talked at a normal pace I would have difficulty following him.

Right…Gawd, he must think I'm an idiot. _The story. _Although it was more of a confession.

"Funny thing really" I started nervously. "It has a lot to do with a guy and a girl and… insecurities, and you know…electronics."

Edward looked at me curiously, clearly not understanding where I was going with this.

_Tell Him!_ The voice in my head screamed at me. Stop rambling and tell him. He's just a guy.

I took a deep breath.

An incredibly attractive, charming, fantastic guy…

"So I guess you're wondering why I'm here." I tried again.

"I think I know why you're here." He smiled.

"You do?" I asked excited.

"Yes. It was very nice of you to come with her tonight to screen me."

Wait? What?

"I'm glad you came. You can never be to sure about the people you meet these days. Especially those you meet after one day of talking on the internet."

"I…I….I guess so." I stammered. "But she trusts you. _Bella _knows you would never hurt her."

"She's right. I would never do anything to lose her trust. I like her too much." The look in his eyes when he talked about "me" was so warm, smoldering even. I needed to know if that look was meant for me or Rosalie.

"What do you like the most about her?" I asked.

"She's nice, and smart, and caring…"

"And _beautiful_?" I guessed.

"Yes, she is beautiful. I've never met anyone like her. There is so much I still want to know about her."

I looked away from him and tried to gather enough strength to tell him the truth. He said he liked me right? Maybe he could look past my little white lie and forgive me. What did I have to lose? We hardly even know each other. Even if he didn't forgive me, and never wanted to see me again, I could get over it. _I think. _

"Edward," I started my voice barely above a whisper, "There is something I need to tell you."

I waited for a response. When I didn't get one, I looked back at Edward. He was focused on something on the other side of the room. I followed his line of vision right to Rosalie. She was making her way back to us, drink in hand. His lips curled into a big goofy grin as Rosalie moved closer to us.

"You really like her don't you?" I commented. It wasn't so much as question as it was a statement of fact.

"How could I not. Look at her. Those eyes, her lips… she's amazing. I will cherish every piece of her forever."

He stood there, all gooey eyed and lost in thought. It was like I wasn't even here. He wanted _her_, all her.

Rosalie approached us and set her drink down on the table. She slung one arm around my shoulders, the other around Edward's.

"So….how's it going?" She asked.

"Um _Bella_…I need to talk to you for a second." I pulled Rose away from the table, far enough so the Edward wouldn't overhear our conversation.

"I couldn't tell him." I admitted.

"Bella, what's the problem?" Rosalie scowled.

"The problem is that he wants you. It's your eyes, your lips, and your body that he wants to cherish for the rest of his life, not mine."

"He really said that?" She questioned.

I nodded.

Rosalie started laughing. "Oh my gosh Bella. How cheesy. You don't really fall for that stuff do you?"

"I thought it was sweet. I only wish he thought that way about me."

"He does feel that way about you. He _knows_ you. I'm just a face."

"Rose, I can't—"

"Fine! Then I'll go tell him the truth for you, and then you and Edward can go live happily ever after."

Rosalie looped her arm through mine and we walked arm and arm back to the table.

She could be difficult to get along with at times, but deep down; she really was a good person.

"Hey Edward…" Rosalie began but then suddenly stopped distracted.

"ROSIE!" A loud booming voice yelled.

Rosalie's eyes turned into saucers as Emmett McCarty bounded directly towards us.

_Oh No. _

I jumped in between him and Rosalie and flung myself into his arms.

"Emmett! You're early. What a surprise! Come with me for a minute please." I urgently dragged him away from the table. He looked back at Rosalie and made a face that said 'is this girl for real'.

"Not that I mind beautiful girls throwing themselves at me, but who are you?"

"SHHH! Not so loud." I warned. "I'm Bella, Rose's roommate. I had to pull you away, because that guy you saw us with, thinks that she's me. You were about to mess the whole thing up."

"Why would you want him to think that? I didn't know Rosie was into role-playing."

Emmett's face lit up with a huge cheesier cat type grin.

"NO! It's just a big mis-understanding. I sent him a picture of the two of us, and didn't correct him when he assumed I was Rosalie. She is going to tell him the truth. She's going to help me fix this." Emmett looked back towards the table. His big goofy grin quickly faded.

"Well it doesn't look like she's trying to hard." He said, his voice somber.

He turned me around to face Edward and Rosalie. Rosalie was leaning into him practically throwing her cleavage into his face as Edward caressed her cheek with the back of her hand. She threw her head back and laughed and he tucked a stray peace of hair behind her ear.

I couldn't believe it! She was totally flirting with him.

I pivoted on my heel and stomped out of the club. Emmett followed, close behind.

"Hey, where are you going?" He questioned.

"I'm leaving!" I didn't look back.

"What about Rosie, you can just leave her in there with him." He was starting to get seriously irritated.

"I'm sure she's in good hands." I argued.

"This is all your fault you know. That Rose, MY Rose is in there getting felt up by some—"

"Enough ok!" I shouted. "I know!…. I know."

* * *

I wasn't intentionally waiting up for Rose, but I couldn't sleep. I couldn't get image of Edward, leaning in to Rose, touching her face, and Rose enjoying it, out of my mind.

My thought's strayed to all possible compromising situations they were probably getting themselves into right now. It was 11:00p when Rosalie finally strolled in.

"Have a good time?" I asked my voice thick with implication. This irritated Rose. She slammed the door closed and threw her purse on her desk before turning to look at me.

"You know Bella," She started. She placed one hand on her hip and tilted her head slightly to the side.

Uh oh.

"This was _not_ my idea. My life was just fine before you decided to be an insecure little chicken shit and set me up with your boyfriend! What did you expect?! Yes, we hung out and had a good time. The only reason I was there talking to him in the first place is because YOU wouldn't. I was there to do _you_ a favor, and don't you forget that."

Rather than engage my self into an argument that I really didn't want to have with Rose, I did, what comes easiest for me.

I apologized.

I told Rosalie that I was sorry and this was my entire fault. I told her, over and over again how much I valued her friendship and begged for her forgiveness. Even though I was still upset for her getting a little too cozy with Edward, I did not bring that up again.

"Did you tell him?" I meekly asked.

"Bella I couldn't." She turned away from me. Before she did, I caught the glimmer of gilt that flickered in her eyes. Her whole demeanor changed as she walked away from me and went to go lay on her bed.

"You like him too, don't you?" I didn't need to wait for the answer. I already knew.

"Look Bella nothing happened. I didn't even kiss him. We just had a few drinks, and talked, about trivial things, you know the weather, sports, and such, and then we danced." She responded.

"You know I don't dance Rose." I whispered.

"No but _I_ do."

I knew what she was doing. She was trying to pull him away from my world and pull him into hers.

"What about Emmett?" I questioned.

"Ahhh Emmett." Rosalie Sighed.

"I think he really likes you." I interjected.

"And I really like him. It's just…I don't know. Things are so confusing for me right now." I had never seen Rose get flustered before. I knew how much they liked each other and I felt bad for being the one to put their relationship in jeopardy.

"So what do we do?" I asked.

"I don't know. Edward is a good guy, but I am not going to waste my life pretending to be you." She said.

She was right.

My life was bland in comparison to hers. Had I really been wasting my life away? How much more was out there for me that I had ignored because I was too wrapped up in my school work and my books. I whipped my eyes with the back of my hand.

"Hey…don't cry. I didn't mean it like that, but I can't help the way I feel."

"It's ok Rose, I understand. You like Edward now. You guys are good for each other, I don't mind." I was such a bad liar and she knew it.

"Cut it out Bella, I don't think I can put up with anymore of your lies tonight. Things are already complicated enough."

We both sat in the dark, in silence lost in our thoughts.

"We have to tell him the truth Rose." I decided. "I'll just shoot him an email and-"

"Don't be stupid Bella, we can't tell him this over email. He deserves better than that. Besides what if he just stops talking to us? Then we both lose out on a great guy."

Now I was getting angry. I hated when she insulted my intelligence.

"Then what Rosalie? I go on dating his mind while you date his body?" I argued.

"Of course not. We just need to tell him the right way so he doesn't end up hating us both. We jut need more time." She mulled it over for a few minutes. "I got it!"

"What is it?" I questioned.

"Yes! You, me, and Edward. We're going to Sharon's party next Saturday. Edward is so much of a gentleman, I think he will always be committed to the person he is with. The problem is, the person he is with doesn't really exist. So, we get him drunk, and find out how he really feels about each of us as individually." She smiled smugly to herself.

I should have known Rosalie would find a solution that supported her under aged drinking habits.

"That's your brilliant plan? We all get drunk off our asses and see what happens?" I looked at her incredously.

"Yeah, you know there is nothing like tons of booze to bring out your true feelings. Do you have a better idea?" She knew I didn't.

"No." I sighed.

* * *

Over the next few days, Rosalie decided to make up for her _confusion_ over her feelings towards Edward by overcompensating with Emmett. He had practically moved into our Dorm.

They were actually very cute together, holding hands, play fighting, huddling up in a corner laughing at their little private jokes. I wouldn't have minded so much, except it reminded me of what I couldn't have with Edward.

Mine and Edward's relationship was limited to awkward instant messages and brief emails.

The night after he met Rosalie and I at the club had been the worst. I logged on that Sunday morning.

JaneDoe007 logging on.

Thatkindofguy: Morning Beautiful.

JaneDoe007: Edward.

Thatkindofguy: How are you?

JaneDoe007: Could be better.

Thatkindofguy: What's wrong?

JaneDoe007: I don't know Edward. Why don't you tell me?

Thatkindofguy: Did you not have a good time last night?

JaneDoe007: Oh Nevermind. So what did you think of my friend Chloe?

ThatKindofguy: Chloe? She seems like a nice girl. Why?

Sure. Plain and boring was always _nice_.

JaneDoe007: Do you think she's pretty?

Thatkindofguy: I guess so. Wait. Is that what this is about? Do you think I was flirting with her last night?

JaneDoe007: No. I know you would never do that.

Why would he ever show any interest in me when he had Rosalie.

Thatkindofguy: You know no one could ever compare to you Bella.

JaneDoe007: Hey, Edward, I have to go. I have a lot of studying to do. Don't take it personally if I don't talk to you again before Friday.

I logged out before he even had time to respond.

Later that day, I sent him an email apologizing for overreacting.

After that, I spent all my free time talking to Edward. No matter how he felt about Rosalie, that didn't change the way I felt about him. Having him this way was better than nothing. I was content, but Rosalie and Emmett's growing physical relationship was wearing on me. By Tuesday, I had enough.

Emmett was hanging out in our dorm room _again._ Falling all over Rosalie _again._ She was sitting on his lap, whispering in his ear and running her fingers through his hair. He growled and started attacking her neck, eliciting a chuckle from Rose.

"Come on you guys!" I complained. "There are other people in this room too. You know ones that actually pay tuition to live here." I glared at Emmett as I said this. He was quickly starting to become the annoying big brother that I never wanted.

"You know Bella. You could learn a few things from Rosie. If you paid a little more attention to your man, and a little less attention to those books, he might actually start to like you."

I know he didn't mean it to be cruel or malicious. Big, dumb, Emmett was never good at censoring his thoughts. He actually thought he was being funny by attacking my relationship with Edward.

I grabbed my backpack off my bed and slammed the door as I left the room.

I walked across campus to the library and settled myself in a study corner on the 3rd floor. I closed my eyes, trying to push back the tears that threatened to fall. I focused on the sounds of the library. Copy machines warming up and sifting through papers. Chairs scraping against linoleum floors. Footsteps.

"Chloe?" I felt a tap on my arm. "Chloe."

I opened my eyes, and there he was. Even in just a T-shirt and a pair of shorts he was beautiful.

"Do you mind if I join you?" He asked.

"No. No. I don't mind. I was actually just about to leave." Which was true, now that Edward was here.

He sat down at the chair that sat caddy corner to my left and placed his backpack on the table. "Wait I kind of wanted to talk to you."

"Oh?" I asked. I sat up in the chair and leaned towards him.

"About Bella." He continued.

"Oh." I leaned back into the chair.

"Do you know about what's going on with her, and that football player?"

"Emmett?" What had she done now.

"Yeah, the guy from the club. I heard from a couple of guys in my class that they've been dating."

The pain in his eyes was unbearable. Damn it Rose. Why couldn't she keep her relationship with Emmett more of a secret? Had she really been flaunting it around campus the way she did when we were back at the dorm.

"Don't get me wrong." He continued "I'm cool with it if they are together. I mean, me and her aren't exclusive or anything. I just thought….I just need to know."

I almost believed him when he said he was ok with Rose and Emmett. _Almost._ I knew he had trust issues still stemming from his last relationship, and I knew how much it would hurt him to go through that again.

"No, Emmett's not Bella's type. She would never date him." I affirmed. I would have to talk to Rose about easing up on the PDA's with Emmett once I got back to my room.

"Really?" He looked hopeful. "I didn't know she had a type."

"She didn't. Not until she met you." I smiled at him, hoping it would ease some of the tension.

"I can't help but think I'm doing something wrong." He stated.

"Why would you think that?" I doubted he could do anything wrong, even if he tried.

"This might sound a little silly. I mean I haven't actually seen Bella since that night at the club, but when I talk to her, I see this sweet, shy, innocent girl. But when we are together, she seems so confident, and fun-loving. I don't know how to react to her anymore. I thought we hit it off, but then, I hear about her being with Emmett and, I just don't know."

"No! You're not doing anything wrong. Never feel that way. You are all she thinks about. Everyday she rushes home from class just so she can talk to you. You bring light and happiness into her otherwise dull life."

These were my feelings I was telling him about my feelings for him, not Rose's. Obviously whatever Rose, thought she felt for him wasn't authentic if she was willing to throw if all away for Emmett.

"Really?" He asked. He looked hopeful.

"Yes. She likes you so much….even if, she doesn't always show it." I hoped he would catch on to the hidden meaning behind my statement.

"I guess that would explain that night at Sparxx. She was so…. different than I expected."

Uh oh.

"What do you mean?" I tried to sound innocent.

"I don't know, it's dumb, forget I said anything." He resigned.

"No tell me." I pressed.

"Talking to her online, our conversations are deep and meaningful and we understand each other. Don't get me wrong, meeting her in person is wonderful, and we had so much in common that I didn't expect, but that night, she just seemed a little uninvolved and…well shallow." He replied.

"Maybe she was just nervous. She was so excited to meet you, and wanted to make a good impression, and sometimes, when you're tying to impress someone, you feel like you have to be what they want you to be instead of what you really are. I don't think she was really herself that night. Don't worry, things will get better."

"Thanks Chloe." He said. He reached over my shoulder and tugged on my ponytail.

"For what?" I asked.

"For being so easy to talk to. And for making me feel better."

We fell into lighter conversation, while we finished out homework at the library and actually ended up having a pretty good time. It was so much easier to talk to him when I wasn't expected to live up to some pre-conceived notion of who he thought I was. Here, with Edward it the library, I could relax and just be me.

After all our studying, Edward and I headed over to the student union. He insisted on repaying me for being a shoulder to cry on so to speak. I refused to let him waste his money buying me dinner, so we settled on ice cream. He had a strawberry short cake good humor bar, and I had a drumstick.

We walked out of the Union, strolling down the lawn in comfortable silence, indulging our ice cream comes.

"You really like that thing?" He said, turning his nose up at my drumstick.

"You can't be serious. This is the best ice cream in the world. So much better than your fruity strawberry shortcake." I teased.

Edward turned and stared at me with a murderous look on his face.

Oh, no. I didn't mean to offend him. It was a joke.

"Edward are you ok?" He narrowed his eyes and clinched his jaw. I backed away from him a little bit.

He pointed his ice cream at me as if it were a dagger. "Bite the ice cream Chloe."

I shook my head and he took a step towards me. He now held his ice cream less than an inch away from my face.

"Bite it." He said again.

"No." Before the word even left my mouth he shoved the good humor bar into my face. He smeared his ice cream from the top of my nose down to my chin.

"Edward!" I screamed.

He took off running. I dropped my drumstick on the ground and sprinted after him.

Of course me, not being as athletic as Edward, only got about 3 yards before I tripped over my own feet and fell to the floor on my hands and knees.

Stupid, athletic, med student.

I rocked back on my heels and whipped my hands on my shorts. He must have realized I had fallen behind. When I looked up, Edward's long legs were standing in front of me.

"Oh man, I'm sorry." Edward offered a hand out to help me up. Once I rose to my feet, I used all my strength to push him on the arm.

"That wasn't very nice." I pretended to be sad.

"Here." He used the bottom of his shirt to whip the smeared ice cream off my face. "I do apologize. Let me make it up to you."

He swung his back pack off to one shoulder and pulled me onto his back. I climbed up and wrapped my arms around his neck. He held onto my legs and zig-zagged across campus with me on his back.

We made it to the dorm and Edward, in a true Herculean effort, climbed three flights of stairs with me on his back. He sped up as we zipped down the hallway towards my room, pushing himself faster and faster with every step.

Then, without warning, he screeched to a stop. The force of my weight, combined with the 10 pound backpacks on our shoulders caused us to topple over and fall to the ground.

I rolled onto my back and stared up at the ceiling. Edward rolled onto his side to face me with a huge grin on his face.

"You ok?" He asked as he tapped me on the tip of my nose. We looked into each other's eyes for a minute and then started laughing hysterically.

"Thanks." I said when I caught my breath. "I had fun."

"Me too." He replied.

"You're forgiven for that little stunt earlier." I sighed, and then closed my eyes. I never would have thought this day would turn out so good. It was a day I never wanted to forget. I replayed this afternoon over and over in my head, memorizing every detail. Every expression on his face, his hazy green eyes, his laugh, his lips…

Without warning, a current of cold air whizzed past us as the door to my room creaked open. Rosalie stood over us with her arms crossed in front of her chest.

"What's going on here?" It was not difficult to detect the edge in her voice. Edward and I quickly climbed to our feet.

"We ran into each other at the library." He explained.

"Yeah" I added on. "Edward just walked me back to the room."

"I see." She eyed me suspiciously. "Why don't you stay a while?"

Rosalie brushed past me and slipped her arms around Edward's neck. She grabbed onto the collar or his shirt and walked backwards, pulling him into the room with her. I followed after them. Not wanting to voluntarily leave them alone together again.

Rosalie was in her usual attention seeking element tonight. She "had" to have his "opinion" on what she should wear to the party on Saturday.

So she pranced around in front of Edward in her skimpiest sluttiest outfits. Very subtle Rose, very subtle. And Edward, he didn't have to act like he was enjoying himself so much.

I had gotten pretty good at ignoring them, but when Rose straddled his lap and started whispering in his ear, I couldn't take it anymore.

"Hey _Bella_, Is Emmett coming back tonight?" I tried to make my voice sound as innocent as possible.

They both froze. It was a low blow, I'll admit, but she was playing dirty. He was just as much mine as he was hers, and I was going to fight for him. I felt bad that I had to take a dig at Edward as well. I vowed to make it up to him.

My comment had the desired effect. Edward stood up, dumping Rosalie off his lap. "I need to get going." He gathered his backpack off the floor and left.

"What the hell Bella!" She yelled at me after Edward had gone.

"Me?!" I gasped. "You know how I feel about him. You can have any guy you want. You already have Emmett wrapped around your finger, why do you need him too?! Why do you get to have them both?" I said.

"Emmett and my relationship is none of your business. I will date whoever I want." She responded.

"I never knew you were so selfish."

"Am I? You monopolize his time on the computer night after night and I'm the selfish one. What's the matter, can't you handle a little healthy competition?"

"This isn't a competition for me Rose! This is my life. My heart is in this. Edward's heart is in this, and it's just a game for you?"

"Give me a break Bella, I'm not heartless. I do like Edward." She responded.

"But you like Emmett more?" I guessed.

Rosalie never answered my question. "Grow up Bella" was all she said before she left.

I didn't know where she was going, but I was sure where ever it was, it involved some sort of male companionship.

After she was gone, I logged into my messenger and waited for Edward to sign in.

Around 7:30 I started to get worried. He should be home by now.

Eight o' clock came and went.

_Where is he?_

My stomach began to twist into knots. He was so angry when he left. What if he'd gone looking for Emmett?

_No!_ I didn't want them to fight. I couldn't stand it if Edward ended up getting hurt because of my stupid comment.

_Eight forty._

_Or _what if he was with Rosalie? What if she went to find him? What if they were finishing what they started while I sat in front of the computer like an idiot waiting for him to log on?

_Please don't be with her._

I stared at my computer screen. Not knowing where he was, or what he was doing was torture.

Images.

Horrible images of what he was doing, and who he was with flashed through my mind.

Twenty minutes later, his name lit up on my buddylist.

JaneDoe007: Edward?

JaneDoe007: Hello…..

JaneDoe007: Paging Dr. Cullen…

JaneDoe007: Edward, if you're here please talk to me.

JaneDoe007:Please…

ThatKindofguy: What do you want me to say? I'm not sure there is anything for us to talk about.

JaneDoe007: Where were you? I was so worried.

ThatKindofguy: No need to worry. Sure you have more than enough people to keep you company when I'm not around.

JaneDoe007: Are you still mad?

ThatKindofguy: Naturally.

JaneDoe007: I'm so sorry Edward.

_I'm such and idiot. _Why did I think this would blow over and everything would be fine?

JaneDoe007: It was just a bad joke.

ThatKindofguy: Spending time with another guy is a joke to you? I thought you took our relationship more seriously than that.

JaneDoe007: No! That's not what I meant.

JaneDoe007: Emmett was here earlier but it wasn't the way Chloe made it sound. It was just…seeing you like that, it was awkward for her. She didn't mean to make you angry, but it was uncomfortable for her and she didn't know what else to do. Both of us feel awful about it.

ThatKindofguy: Are you with him?

JaneDoe007: No!! I'm sorry if I did anything to hurt you.

JaneDoe007: So sorry.

JaneDoe007: I don't know what I would do without you. Tell me what I can do to make it up to you? Anything you want, it's yours. I'll do anything to show you how much you mean to me.

ThatKindofguy: Will you tell me if you don't want to be with me?

JaneDoe007: Don't be ridiculous. I never want to be without you.

ThatKindofguy: I didn't realize how much of my heart is invested to you. The thought of you being with someone else is enough to drive me crazy. It would hurt like hell let you go, but I could do it, if it would make you happy. Please Bella, before we become any closer I need to know.

JaneDoe007: Okay, I promise.


	3. Chapter 3

**Disclaimer: **I own none of the characters in this story.

* * *

A/N: In this Chapter Edward and Bella watch RENT together. If you haven't seen the movie, the youtube links to the songs that are mentioned in this chapter are up in my profile. Also, when I first posted this chapt. the formatting looked **horrible**. I hope nobody read it that way, should be fixed now. Please R&R :)

* * *

I wasn't surprised that Rosalie didn't come back right away. She was pretty upset when she left and she wasn't the type of person to just let things blow over.

She came home sometime during the early morning while I was still in bed. I'd heard her start the shower, and later rustling around her side of the room.

I didn't dare let her know that I was awake. I couldn't face her after last night. I'd upset her yesterday, and she left because of me. Now that she was back, I didn't know if I could handle anymore of her yelling at me. So I laid quietly in bed and waited for her to leave again.

I couldn't believe how badly I'd managed to mess things up. Rosalie was mad at me and my relationship with Edward, which started out so innocent and honest had become filled with lies.

He thought I was messing around on him with another guy. Another guy who I personally couldn't stand and would have nothing to do with if I had a choice.

He said he would forgive me. He said that things would be fine as long as I was honest about my feelings for him. And I wished that were true, but I knew better. Even talking to him online last night, I could tell he wasn't the same.

I'd lost a piece of him, because he couldn't completely trust me anymore.

When I was certain she'd gone, I got up out of bed and drug myself to the bathroom. I brushed teeth. I washed my face. I was making my way toward my closet to pick out my clothes for the day when a knock on the door caused me to re-route.

_Rosalie._

"Did you forget your keys?" I sighed as I flung the door open.

Oh my gosh.

"Edward!" I gasped, "What are you doing here?"

"I know it's early, but I was hoping to catch Bella before she left for the morning, is she here?"

_Yes._

"N...no, she's not here." I looked away from him, afraid that he would find the dishonesty in my words. "I'll tell her you stopped by."

"Wait, Chloe, I wanted to talk to you too."

"Okay." I reluctantly agreed. There was something about the tone of his voice that made me uncomfortable.

He wasn't his usual charming self this morning. He looked drawn and tired as thought he hadn't slept in days. His eyes, which always held so much life, were sunken and dark.

I stepped aside and allowed him to enter. He took two steps into the room and then turned to face me. I closed the door behind him and stood with my back pressed against it.

"Why did you do it?" He demanded.

"What do you mean?" I whispered. I knew exactly what he was talking about, but I was too ashamed to admit it.

"You lied to me Chloe. You made me believe that she…that I…damn it!" He growled as he forcefully raked his fingers through his hair. His handsome features contorted in a mask of pain.

"I trusted you."

He wasn't angry, that I would have been able to deal with. If he screamed and yelled and called me names, it still wouldn't have hurt as bad as seeing him like this, seeing the sadness in his eyes, hearing the disappointment in his voice when he spoke to me.

"You can still trust me." I responded, my voice barely above a whisper.

I didn't lie to him, not really. Everything I told him yesterday was true and real. The problem was that he never got to meet the Bella I was telling him about. He only knew Rosalie's tainted version of me.

"I would never lie to you."

Again. I mentally added.

"You made me believe that she didn't have anything to do with him."

"The Bella I know wouldn't." I said with as much authority as I could muster.

We stared at each other unmoving.

It was as if he was looking deep into my soul, searching for some sign that he could trust me again. It was almost painful to look at him, but I couldn't look away.

Then, after facing each other for what felt like an eternity, he turned away. He walked across the room, sat down on the edge my bed and buried his face in his hands.

And my heart broke.

I never meant for any of this to happen. I never wanted to hurt him.

I knew what I needed to do to make things right again. I needed to tell him the truth.

But I couldn't, not now. It wasn't the right time. He was sad enough, and telling him about the lie now would only be rubbing salt into the wounds.

Edward didn't need that right now. He needed a friend.

I hesitated for just a moment before moved to Edward's side of the room. I climbed onto the bed so that I was kneeling beside him, and slowly circled my arms around his neck. I rested my head against his and whispered sweet comforting words of my feelings for him, and how much his friendship meant to me into his ear.

After a few minutes he finally started to relax. He dropped his hands away from his face and rested his head against my shoulder. I used the tips of my fingers to lightly massage his scalp at the base of his neck.

"I do trust you Chloe," He sighed, as he wrapped his arms around my waist and pulled me tight against his body in an embrace. "There's no way you could have known."

"Will you be okay?" I asked shyly.

He shifted in my arms so that he could look at me as he responded to my question. His arms stayed wrapped around my waist and he leaned in to me, resting his forehead against mine.

"Don't worry about me." He said, avoiding an answer to my question.

"I can't help it. I always think about you." I admitted.

"Yeah, I'll be fine." He said as though he were trying to convince himself. "Thanks to you," he added "you always know how to make me feel better."

What happened next, I will never understand, because it came on suddenly and there was no forewarning. Maybe it was being so close to him. Or maybe it was the way his cool breath felt on my skin.

One minute I was comforting him, and the next all I wanted was for him to kiss me.

"Edward…" I spoke his name softly. Before I knew what I was doing, I leaned in to close the small distance between my lips and his.

"I should go." He said before our lips could touch. He gently untangled himself from my grasp and rose to leave.

"Do you have to?" I asked, flustered.

"I think so." He replied, getting up and moving across the room.

I leapt off the bed and ran after him. I caught up to him just before he reached the door. "Edward." I caught him by the arm, "Are we okay?"

"I don't know what I would do with out you." He brushed the back of his hand across my cheek before turning to leave.

* * *

The fight last night was the beginning of a power struggle between me and Rose. The funny thing was, I didn't know we were in a power struggle until Emmett came banging on my door later in the afternoon.

"Emmett what's going on?" He never came to my room unless Rosalie was here.

"What did you do this time Bella!" He accused. I hadn't seen him so angry since that night at Sparxx.

Oh.

"This is about Edward." I guessed.

"Rose said we needed some time apart so she could sort out her feelings."

"I'm sorry Emmett."

He explained that Rosalie spent the night with him after we'd had our little argument over Edward. Emmett was thrilled that Rosalie wanted to spend the night with him, and referred to it as one of the best nights of his life. That's why he was taken by surprise when today, Rosalie told him that she couldn't see him anymore.

I never though she take it that far. She gave up Emmett, so that she could command all of Edward's attention.

"What do you want me to do Emmett? You know first hand how hard it is for guys to resist Rose. He's never going to choose me now that he has her all to himself. It's over for us."

Emmett clenched onto my shoulders and looked me square in the eyes.

"Bella, I'm going to tell you something, and if you ever tell Rose I said this I will kill you, but you are a beautiful girl."

"Oh come on Emmett" I started to pull away from him. He turned me back to face him.

"I'm serious. Did you not see how every guy in the club was looking at you last weekend? You're an attractive girl. Your problem is that you're just so damn unapproachable, you scare guys off." He said.

"What's your point Emmett." I said annoyed.

"Why don't you fight for him Bella? I'll help you even, if it means getting Rose back."

"You're going to help me steal Edward back from Rose?"

"Yup. And we are going to start with your clothes."

"What do you know about clothes Emmett?" I rolled my eyes.

"Please, Bella, I'm a guy. Trust me I know what looks good."

"And changing my appearance is supposed to suddenly make Edward interested in me how?"

"He's already interested in you."

"No he's not."

"Yes he is." Emmett argued.

"No he's not! He hardly notices me." I pulled away from Emmett and this time he let me go.

"Yes he is! Do you think Rosalie would be doing this if he wasn't?"

I wanted to argue his logic and tell him that he was wrong again, but I couldn't. He actually had a point. Rosalie can have any guy she wants, whenever she wants. It made no sense that she would feel threatened by what little time Edward spent with me. Unless she thought there was a chance he would choose me over her.

I believed her when she said she had feeling for him, but even if she had no interest what so ever in Edward, she would still fight for him. Rosalie was never good at handling rejection, and she would never accept the fact that someone might not be interested in her.

"Come on Bella! You spend all day holed up in this room avoiding the world. How will he ever know what you want from him if you don't tell him? How will he know how much you like him if you don't show him? You like him don't you?"

"Yes." I answered.

"And I know he likes you too. All you two need is a push in the right direction."

I must be a desperate woman.

"Fine!" I agreed.

Shopping with Emmett was one of the oddest experiences of my life. Emmett and I both definitely had very different ideas of what constitutes "looking good." We argued over the length of the skirts, tight vs. comfortable shirts, and shoes.

It only took about 2 hours to come to a reasonable compromise on the clothes that we bought.

And just when I was starting to have faith in Emmett, he decided it would be a good idea to cut my hair.

"Absolutely not." I argued.

"Oh come on Bella. I promise I wont let them take away any of the length. Just add some layers so it doesn't just hang there. Your hair is so thick already; I bet you'll hardly even notice."

"No. I don't want to." I affirmed.

"You said you would trust me. Besides I'm not going to make you look bad. Do it for Edward."

It was a lame attempt at persuasion, but it worked.

"If this turns out bad, I am holding you personally responsible." I said while jabbing my finger at him.

We entered the salon that we passed earlier at the west entrance of the mall. I glared at Emmett the whole time while they primped and washed and snipped at my hair. He seemed to think it was funny. His response to my death glares was to smile and throw me thumbs up signs.

Finally, 300 snips and 2 hours later, they were done. The hairstylist turned me around in the chair so I was facing the wall mounted mirror.

"Wow." It looked amazing. Loose curls framed my face, and cascaded down my shoulders. I turned my head from side to side. My hair was bouncy, and it never looked so soft.

"I told you it would look good." Emmett Gloated. "Wait till he sees you. He won't be able to keep his hands off you."

"Do we have to do this Emmett?" He had spent the last 20 minutes, hanging out in my room, teaching me moves seduce Edward.

"Yes, we do." He stated, "You're competing against Rose. We have to pull out all the stops."

"Ughh! This is NOT a competition! Emmett please stop touching my Hair. It's creeping me out."

"Don't forget who bought you that hairstyle. I have to make sure its doing its job." He laughed. "Tell me what you learned, and I'll leave you alone."

I rolled my eyes. "Uh… 1.Be confident, keep my back straight, and keep my shoulders back because it will expose my chest and make him think about sex."

"Go on." Emmett pressed. He was enjoying this way too much.

"2. Make eye contact and then look away."

"It's called flirting Bella." He interjected.

I covered my face with my hands, in attempt to hide the blush that was creeping onto my cheeks. This is so dumb. The faster I get this over with, the faster I can get my room back. I took a deep breath and continued.

"3. Play with my hair. 4. Do anything I can to draw attention to my mouth 5.Touch him on accident and pretend I don't know what's going on. And 6.Show some skin. Are we done?" I responded.

"Ok, now that you got the basics down… on to kissing." Emmett stated as he clapped his hands together.

"Ok, I think we've done enough for one day." I said as I pushed Emmett towards the door.

"Wait!" He called out while looking back over his shoulder. "Nibble on his ear, he'll like that."

"Bye Emmett."

I opened the door and ushered him outside.

"And try and spice things up a little, use that laptop to your advantage." He yelled as I closed the door in his Face.

"See you at the party!" I yelled through the door, hoping he would take the hint and realize I was done with the 'how to catch a man' training.

* * *

It wasn't enough for Rose to just come home after spending all day and all evening with Edward. She had to come home and gloat about it.

_Oh my God, Edward is so sexy. And Oh my God, Edward says the sweetest things. _And my personal favorite: _Wow! Edward smells so good, and he has the softest hands. I could just cuddle up next to him for days._

Over the next 24 hours, I'd seriously given a lot of thought about what Emmett said about "spicing things up" with Edward.

Why should Rosalie get to be the only one who is allowed to spend time with him? I wasn't going to sit back and let her dictate my relationship with Edward. I wasn't going to let her control me anymore.

Friday after all my classes were over I convinced myself to take a walk across campus and casually hang outside of the college of medicine.

I decided to wear a white tank top underneath a black halter vest. I paired it with a pair of sheer black leggings and a pleated mini skirt.

I pinned my hair up with hot rollers. When I took them out, my hair dropped down my shoulders in loose curls. I looked myself over in the mirror before I walked out of my room, and for the first time, I was impressed with what I saw.

From our conversations on the internet, I'd grown to know Edwards class schedule fairly well. His last class today ended at 3:45. I sat down on the wall that ran along the side of the new Nursing Building and pretended to be reading my copy of "The Daily Wildcat," the school newspaper I picked up on the walk here.

As the minutes ticked by, I started to get more and more nervous. How would I explain hanging out in front of his building without him thinking I'm a stalker?

I almost lost my resolve. But then I saw him, in his khaki pants and fitted T-shirt walking down the steps of the building. He looked so handsome. I had to do this. I needed to fight for him.

I put down my paper and walked in Edward's direction. My pulse sped up and my legs started to get wobbly.

Breathe.

"Edward" I shouted, using my arms to wave him down.

"Chloe." He said, although it sounded like more of a question than a statement. His eyes grew wide and as he appraised my appearance a slow smile spread across his face.

For the first time, I felt confident in what I was doing.

"Hey." I said, returning his smile.

"Hey." He answered. The expression his face held was warm and soft.

"I haven't seen you around here before. Do you have classes on this side of campus?"

_Shoot._

"No I…uh actually I…um…I was looking for you."

"Really?" He asked.

"Uh yeah. I was thinking of, um… moving out of the dorm and renting an apartment next semester, and, um, I was wondering if there was any place that you might recommend."

Not a lie I convinced myself. I would move out of the dorms and get an apartment eventually. Just probably not for another year or two.

Edward spent about 10 minutes talking to me about all the student friendly apartments he knew of which were reasonably priced and close to campus. I enjoyed being in his presence, standing so close to him, watching his full lips move up and down as he spoke, but I had to move things along. We were getting no where.

"What about your place?" I asked, "Do you like it?"

"Of course" He chuckled, "It's a little farther away from campus than the others I mentioned, but you can't beat the price."

Ok. Here goes nothing.

"Maybe I could see it sometime?" I said, trying to keep my voice even.

"Sure." His voice was shaky and he actually sounded a little nervous himself. "When did you want to look at the apartment?"

"How about now?"

* * *

The plan had been set in motion. I, the shy, mousy, Isabella Swan, was going to seduce Edward Cullen.

_Oh hell_, what was I thinking?

I hardly remembered the car ride from the school to Edward's apartment. I was so hyperaware of Edward, I could barely focus on anything else.

Sooner than I expected, we pulled into the parking lot of his apartment complex. I unbuckled my seatbelt and stretched over the arm rest to collect my backpack from the back seat of his car.

By the time I turned back around in my seat, Edward had walked around to the passenger side of the car, and was holding my door open for me.

He started at me intently, studying my every motion.

"What?" I questioned, while swinging my legs out of the car.

"It's nothing." He answered.

Edward took hold of my hand and helped me out of the car.

He led me around the complex, stopping, at the laundry room, and then the recreation center before ending at his apartment.

I waited patiently while he fumbled around in his backpack looking for his keys.

"You'll have to excuse the mess. I wasn't expecting company." He said as he unlocked the door.

I stepped into the living room and my jaw nearly dropped. His apartment looked like something that belonged on an episode of MTV cribs (a show where they show you all the expensive stuff celebrities have in their homes).

The apartment itself was standard, white wall, beige carpet, linoleum tile and brown cabinets in the kitchen. But he had the most amazing stuff. A 40 gallon fish tank filled with the yellow, red, orange, and blue tropical fish sat against the west wall of the living room.

A cushy black L shaped la-z- boy reclining sofa, sat directly across from a silver wall mounted entertainment center. In the middle of the center, was a 52 inch LD flat screen tv, that was hooked up to a surround sound system.

"This is amazing." Was there anything about Edward that wasn't?

I walked over to the entertainment center and began fingering through his DVD selection. He had so many movies, action, drama, TV shows, concert series, documentaries, comedies, and… musicals! It took all of my restraint not to start jumping up and down and clapping my hands together.

"Musicals?" I asked, whirling around to look at him. "Are you kidding me?"

He averted his eyes and nervously rubbed his hand against the back of his neck. "I only have a few; I watch them mostly for the compositions." I could swear I saw a shade of red creeping up on his neck.

"Oh, no, don't be embarrassed! Do you know how absolutely incredibly awesome that is?! I love musicals and you have so many of my favorites."

"Yeah?" He said, relaxing a little.

"Mmm hmm." I answered. I removed a DVD from the collection. "Can we watch this one?"

"I thought you wanted to see the apartment."

I looked away from him, flustered. I did want to see the apartment too, but mostly I just wanted to spend time with him.

"Sure." He said, as he walked over to where I was standing and took the movie out of my hands. He popped the case open while smiling my favorite lopsided smile and winking at me. "It's one of my favorites too."

I ran over and leapt onto the couch. I threw my backpack off, setting it down on the floor in front of me, and folded my legs underneath my body. I clasped my hands together in my lap, waiting anxiously for the movie to start. Edward chuckled, shaking his head back and forth.

"Can I get you a soda or anything?" He asked.

"Umm…a coke?" I shouted after him.

While Edward sought out our refreshments, I dug around in my backpack for a hair tie. Okay. Time to set the plan in motion. Once I found what I was looking for, I pulled my hair up into a sloppy ponytail, exposing the curves of my shoulder and my neck. _Ok, show some skin, check._

I arched my back a little, shifting most of my weight onto my left arm. _Expose the chest, check._ I felt like an idiot, posing on his sofa as if I were about to jump into a sports illustrated swimsuit photo shoot. If this didn't work I was going to kill Emmett.

Edward came around the sofa, wielding 2 cokes. He hesitated for a second, letting his eyes roam over my curves before handing me my drink.

"Nice shirt." He said, as he sat down next to me.

"Thanks." I answered shyly.

I took a long sip from my soda can. After I finished drinking, I took a second to lick the extra moisture off my lips. _Ok, draw attention to my mouth, Check._

He wasn't even paying attention. He stared straight ahead, focused on the TV screen.

And I felt like an idiot. This wasn't working at all. I should have known better. Emmett was as good as dead the next time I saw him. I leaned over to set my soda can down on the coffee table.

"Ready now?" He asked, pointing the remote towards the DVD player and pushing play.

I nodded, crossing my legs Indian style and turning to face the TV. I abandoned my plan and decided to just relax and enjoy spending time with him.

Nothing beat watching RENT (the movie version of Jonathan Larson's musical about people in the 80's learning to deal with living with AIDS and falling in love) with Edward. We both knew all the words to songs and starting singing along with the actors during the first musical number. Soon after the 2nd number we assigned each other parts to sing.

"You should be the girls naturally." He argued, putting the movie on pause.

"Nope." I responded, "I can't be Joann and Maureen. Then I'll be singing to myself and that's no fun."

"Fine" He sighed, dramatically rolling his eyes.

"I get Maureen." I blurted out.

"Then I get dibs on Collins." He smiled.

"Woops, wait, I wanted Collins."

"Too late" He laughed. "And since I am Joann, you have to be Mark so we can sing "The Tango Maureen together."

"Ok, then you get Benny. Should we flip a coin to see who gets to be Roger and who gets to be Mimi?"

"I'll be Roger, smart alec" He teased.

"Ok 'Roger'" I said, grabbing the remote from him and pushing the play button, "You're up."

He started in on "One Song Glory" and left me in awe by the time the song was over. No one could sing this song as well as Adam Pascal (the actor who plays Roger), but Edward was pretty damn close. Was there anything he couldn't do.

"Wow…" I suddenly felt inadequate. I averted my eyes and nervously began chewing on my bottom lip. Edward grabbed onto my shoulders and turned me so that we were facing each other. He then brought his hands up to cup either side of my jaw, and gently, he raised my head so that our faces were level. He gazed into my eyes and began singing (light my candle) to me.

_(Roger)What'd you forget?_ He started.

_(Mimi) Got a light?_ I spoke, all enthusiasm absent from my voice.

_(Roger)I know you? -- You're --You're shivering_

His eyes never left mine; they were bright encouraging and reassuring. I felt silly for even thinking that he would be disappointed in me.

_(Mimi)It's nothingThey turned off my heat_

_And I'm just a littleWeak on my feet_

_Would you light my candle?_

_What are you staring at?_

I smiled at him. It was my silent way of letting Edward know that I appreciated his efforts to make me feel comfortable again.

_(Roger)Nothing….Your hair in the moonlight_

He walked his fingers along the side of my jaw, catching a loose piece of hair and tucking in behind my ear.

_You look familiar_

As he brought his free hand down from my ear, his fingertips lightly brushed against my neck, causing me to involuntarily shiver.

_Can you make it?_ He smirked.

_(Mimi)Just haven't eaten much todayAt least the room stopped spinning.Anyway._

I playfully pushed him in the chest as I sang my last line.

_What?_

_(Roger)Nothing… _

He smiled back at me. _Y_

_our smile reminded me of - (Mimi)I always remind people of…._ I playfully rolled my eyes.

_who is she?_

_(Roger)She died. Her name was April _

_(Mimi) It's out again_

I leaned closer to him and blew in his ear during the part where Mimi blows out the candle, electing my own shiver from Edward. It felt good, seeing him react to me that way. I couldn't stop the grin that spread across my face.

_Sorry about your friend_

_Would you light my candle? _

_(Roger)Well… _

_(Mimi)Yeah…_

I draped my arms over his shoulders and clasped my hands together behind his neck.

_Ow! _

_(Roger)Oh, the wax - it's… _

_(Mimi)Dripping! _

_I like it - between my –_

I tightened my grip on his neck and pressed my body against his.

_(Roger)Fingers. I figured..._

He stood up, pulling me with him. He unclasped my fingers from behind his head.

_Oh, well. Goodnight. _

Once my hands were loose, he held onto my arm and spun me away from him.

From this point on, we had gone from merely singing the lines, to dancing around his apartment and acting out entire scenes. Somehow, I'd managed to assign myself mostly fun loving, rambunctious characters who love to be the center of attention, while Edward had all the easygoing characters that got to relax and fall into the background. He was having too much fun teasing me about my choice of roles.

"Chloe..." He said, while spinning me around during the musical intermission of 'The Tango Maureen,'

"You're doing an excellent job, you really are, but for your next solo, I'd like you to put a little more feeling into it."

Ha! My next solo was Mimi's stripper performance. He grinned sheepishly while he dipped me. I let my head fall back, the tips of my hair brushed across the floor. He pulled me back up and held me against his chest as we danced through the rest of the song.

* * *

What in the world was I thinking? I could hardly walk without tripping over my own two feet, let alone dance. And here Edward was expecting an amazing performance.

He stretched out on the far end of the couch. I walked around behind the sofa, not wanting to stand in front of the TV and have Edward know how badly I was going to screw up Mimi's performance.

I started facing away from Edward, looking back at him over my shoulder as I sang. He had repositioned himself so that he was ¾ of the way facing me.

_Whats the time?  
Well it's gotta be close to midnight_

I spun around so that Edward was now directly in front of me. I gripped the head of the sofa for balance while I lifted my knee to my chest and then slowly extended my leg, pointing my toe as I stretched, bringing my ankle to the side of my face.

_My body's talking to me  
It say,'Time for danger'_

Edwards jaw dropped, and he stared at me with wide eyes. It was a good response. I had taken years of ballet lessons as a child. I was never able to do pirouettes, I was never able to do the leaps, but this was the one thing I could do. His reaction gave me the boost of confidence I need to continue my shenanigans.

I decided to hold my pose for a little longer than necessary.

_It says 'I wanna commit a crime_

As I brought my extended foot back to the floor, maintaining my grip on the sofa, and I leaned slightly over. I shimmied my shoulders back and forth, the movement causing my breasts to bounce up and down.

_Wanna be the cause of a fight_

_Wanna put on a tight skirt and flirt  
With a stranger'_

I started with my shoulders, then allowed my breast, abs, and hips, to pop in face as I did four body rolls in his direction.

_I've had a knack from way back_

_At breaking the rules once I learn the  
Game_

_Get-up life's too quick  
I know someplace sick  
Where this chick'll dance it the flames_

He continued to stare at me, unmoving. I smiled and winked at him before I released the sofa and took a step back. I crossed my arms and held myself at the waist while I shook my hips back and forth.

_We don't need any money_

_I always get in for free_

_You can get in too  
If you get in with me_

Then I raised my arms above my head and spun around in circles.

_Let's go ooouuut tonight  
I have to go ooouuut tonight_

Once I stopped spinning, I grabbed the hem of my shirt, and raised it up a little, playfully twirling it back and forth.

_You wanna play?  
Let's run away_

_We wont be back  
Before it's New Years Day  
Take me out tonight …_

I did it! I finished Mimi's performance! And I actually had fun doing it. Eager to share my excitement with Edward, I forgot about the rest of the song, ran around the couch and jumped on the sofa next to him.

He turned sideways so that his back was propped up against the arm of the sofa. I folded my legs underneath me and positioned myself so that I was fully facing him.

"I did it." I said proudly.

"You were Phenomenal." He responded.

"Well you bring out the best in me." I said, as I lifted my chin and smiled at him. He averted his eyes and looked away from me.

"Hey what's wrong?" I said, lightly touching the back of his hand.

"It's nothing." He answered sadly.

Right.

"Oh Edward, aren't we past that?" I complained. This was the 2nd time in two days that he'd dismissed my questions and it was really starting to annoy me.

"You know you can tell me anything." I said more gently. I absentmindedly began stroking my fingers back and forth across his hand.

"I'm embarrassed to say." He admitted, meeting my gaze again.

"Don't be."

"Chloe," He sighed, "what am I going to do when you meet someone, and he steals you away from me? I feel so lost without you."

Are you kidding me?

"That would never happen." I climbed over his legs so that my knees were straddling either side of his hips and leaned down to embrace him in a hug. "No one could every take me away from you." I whispered against his ear.

"I wish that were true." He sighed. I felt the tips of his fingers lightly sauntered up my arms, leaving a trail of goosebumps everyplace they touched. "Don't you know how beautiful you are?" He asked as his hands molded around the curves of my shoulders.

I leaned back so that I could see his face and then I told him, "I'll always be here for you Edward, as long as you want me."

"Chloe." He whispered. His voice quivered as he spoke.

The look in his eyes was intense. It wasn't the same innocent encouraging look he gave me earlier. This time, his eyes were hungry and filled with desire.

"What is it?" I prompted.

His palms brushed across my collar, before his fingers walked up my neck and wove into my hair. The motion caused my ponytail to slip loose and my hair became unbound, cascading around his arms.

"You're so beautiful." He whispered.

Then he gripped the back of my head and gently pulled my face down to his. He used the tip of his nose to trace a path from my chin, up to my ear, and then back down across my jaw. The sensation of his movements caused my whole body to tremble.

"Mmmm…" He moaned as he nuzzled his face against my neck.

"Edward..." I breathed as I tangled my fingers into his hair. He was driving me crazy.

"Oh Chloe," He groaned, "I want to…."

He didn't finish his sentence. Instead, he placed soft kisses along my throat, just underneath my jaw.

"I really want to kiss you right now" he panted.

I pulled on his hair, forcing him to lift his head and look at me.

"Kiss me." I begged.

His hands slid out of my hair, and held onto my face. My heart pounded against the inside of my chest. The tips of our noses touched.

"Gawd Chloe, I want you so badly." He said, His arms trembled with the strain of holding back. "I…I can't…I can't do that to her."

I pushed myself off his lap, and moved away from him.

Edward rose to a sitting position. "I'm sorry." He murmured, "I should have never-"

No.

"Don't!" I said, feeling the sting of rejection.

"Chloe…" He said as though he were getting ready to lecture me.

This wasn't a mistake. I didn't care if he was thinking it; I wouldn't let him say it. I turned away from him and covered my face with my hands.

"I should take you home."


	4. Chapter 4

**Disclaimer: **I own none of the characters in this story.

* * *

A/N: Yay! New Chapter. Please R&R :) I will add links to Bella's and Rosalie's outfits for the party sometime this week.

* * *

I don't know how I expected him to react. I didn't necessarily expect him to turn cartwheels and leap for joy, but I didn't expect him to react this way either.

Edward didn't attempt talk to me again. In fact, he hardly even looked at me. Even after we left the apartment he was silent the entire drive back to campus.

I knew that he must be feeling incredibly guilty about what almost happened earlier and we needed to talk. Except, I had no idea what to say or where to begin. Tonight had been both one of the best and one of the worst nights of my life. It was wonderful, because Edward finally realized he had feelings for me, and he told me I was beautiful. And it was horrible because, although he wanted to be with me, he wanted to be with Rosalie more.

I couldn't understand why he was so determined to have a committed relationship with (of all people) Rosalie.

Rosalie, the girl who makes out with guys in clubs to get free drinks.

Rosalie, whose aspiration for the rest of the year is to win a wet T-shirt contest.

This was who he wanted? The thought made me feel sick to my stomach. It was true, that she had spent more time with Edward, but she didn't care about him, not the way that I did. It frustrated me to no end that he was so blinded by her long legs and good looks that he couldn't see that.

I turned my back to Edward and stared out the window while we drove.

The weather in Arizona was usually predictable: sunny and hot. For a couple of months out of the year monsoon thunderstorms would hit. The skies would be clear all day, and then out of nowhere the wind would pick up, the clouds would come in, and then rain would start pouring down. Tonight looked like it was going to be one of those nights.

Sure enough, when we pulled around to the parking lot behind my dorm, the images outside my window became wet and blurry and the pitter patter of rain drops clanked against the metal of Edward's car.

Edward hopped out of the car as soon as it was stopped. He ran around to the passenger side of the car, held my door open for me, and waited for me to exit the car.

Okay, I can take a hint.

Still, part of me hoped that now that he had time to think things through, he would realize that what he felt for me wasn't wrong and we were meant to be together.

I stepped out of the car and the rain instantly soaked through my hair and clothes.

And as I stood there, looking at Edward, I half expected that he would pull me into his arms and tell me whatever feelings he had for Rosalie didn't matter, because he wanted to be with me.

I kept hoping….

And I was disappointed when he didn't.

"Is it really such a bad thing realizing that you like me?" I asked.

He sighed heavily then said, "It's complicated. You…you were one of my best friends. My only friend really, I should have never crossed that line."

Were? The way that he referred to me in past tense worried me. He didn't want to spend time with me anymore? No. He couldn't mean that.

"Edward, we're still friends. Aren't we?" I questioned, anxiety creeping into my voice.

"I don't think I can ever look at you as just a friend anymore…No, I don't think we can be."

"You don't want to see me anymore?" I whispered.

He grabbed my hand in his and lifted it to his face. He laced his fingers through mine and held it there. "How can I be close to you when all I want to do is touch you, when all I can think about is kissing you?" He cupped my jaw with his free hand and traced his thumb across my lip. He then trailed his hand down the side of my neck and brushed wet hair away from my face and off my shoulder.

"I can't." He said, sadly and then moved away from me. "It would be too difficult for me now."

No, this can't be happening.

My arms dropped limply to my side and I swallowed back the lump that was rising in my throat.

"You're doing this because of her?" I questioned, even more anxious now.

He didn't say anything. Though, his silence was confirmation enough.

This was wrong, so wrong. The only reason I continued to go along with this stupid lie, was because I didn't want to lose him. And now I was losing him anyway?

"Please Edward," I begged, "You don't mean it. I know you don't." I chocked out.

"I'm sorry." He said. "Please don't make this harder for me than it already is."

"Did you sleep with her?" I challenged. Why else would he want to stay with her?

"No! That's not what this is about."

"Then why do you like her?! What is so great about her that you won't even take a chance on us?"

"I don't know. I guess I keep hoping that she'll change, that she'll go back to being that sweet, shy, girl I could talk to about anything, who was always excited to talk to me too. I hope that she will stop throwing herself at other guys and realize what she has in me. I hope that one day I will be able to get along with her in person, as well as I do on the computer. I didn't expect that our relationship would be easy… but what we had in the beginning was wonderful; I guess part of me isn't ready to give that up."

Everything he said he wanted in her, all the things that was trying to hold on to, had nothing to do with Rosalie! Those were all things about me.

I couldn't believe how stupid I'd been. All this time, I thought it was his attraction to Rosalie that was holding him back. It wasn't Rosalie at all that was keeping us from being together, it was me.

He didn't want to be with her. He hardly knew anything about her. And here he was about to break off our relationship for something that wasn't real. The girl he really wanted was standing right in front him. He was making a huge mistake. He didn't understand.

"You're wrong, about her. She's not the person that you think she is, it's all a lie." I said urgently.

"Stop it Chloe! I can't do this right now." He said dismissively. His voice was hard and cold. It irritated me to no end that he was willing to throw everything we had built together away without talking to me about it first.

"No!" I shouted back, even more determined now to prove my point. You WILL listen to me. "She doesn't love you. And she doesn't respect you. Hell Edward I don't even think she really likes you that much. She doesn't have feelings for you the way I do. She will never want you the way I want you. She will never understand how smart, and sweet, and amazing you are because She's! Not! Me! "

Let him think about that.

"Why are you doing this Chloe? Why are you trying to break us up? She's you friend." He scolded.

"Roommate." I corrected. "Rosalie is my roommate."

"Rosalie?" His eyes furrowed together in confusion. Then, as he began to understand the meaning behind my words, sadness, and then rage colored his features.

That's right!

If he wanted to be with her, fine! If it was Rosalie he wanted, then it was Rosalie he would get.

"Rosalie, goes out every weekend because she can't appreciate spending all her time with just one person. Rosalie has no idea what she wants to do with her life and only signs up for classes because she thinks the teachers are hot. Rosalie has had at least 7 boyfriends in past 6 months, and—he'll love this one— Rosalie is dating Emmett McCarthy, the football player."

"Damn it!" He shouted. "What else has she been lying to me about?" He slammed the passenger door of his car so hard I thought the window would shatter from the impact. Then he turned away from me and stormed around to the front of the car.

"Edward!" I yelled after him. I regretted what I'd said about Rosalie as soon as the words left my mouth. Sure I wanted him to know the truth about her, but in hindsight, I realized that probably wasn't the best way to tell him.

"EDWARD!" I called out to him again.

And he ignored me.

I sloshed after him and caught him by his arm just before he reached his car door.

"Edward will you wait—" And then his lips were on mine. They were cool and slick from the rain, and moved forcefully against my own. He wrapped one arm around my waist and pinned me firmly against his body. I wrapped my arms around his neck. I held on to him as tightly as I could and I kissed him back.

There was nothing gentle or innocent about the way we went at each other. It was savage and raw and desperate. Edward pressed me back against the hood of his car as we both poured all of our anger, frustration and desire into this kiss.

It was perfect, and it was wrong because it wasn't a kiss between Edward and Bella, two spirits who'd reunited after being apart, it was a kiss between Edward and Chloe, the best friend of the girl who'd betrayed his trust.

I knew that if I wanted to be with him, really be with him, I couldn't continue to lie to him. I had to tell him.

"Edward." I gasped, reluctantly breaking away from his lips. "Way—"

He lowered his mouth to my neck, and he proceeded kiss and nip at the skin just above my collar. As soon as his lips touched my throat, my body felt weak and my bones felt like they were made of water. It wasn't long before my arms were no longer able to support the weight of my upper body. They slipped out from under me and I fell flat against the cool metal of the car with Edward lying on top of me.

I almost forgot why I wanted to stop him, almost.

"Wait a minute." I said, pushing against his chest. "I need you to listen to me."

He leaned back slightly so that he could see my face.

"What's wrong?" He panted. "Isn't this what you wanted?"

"Yes…No…not this way."

He grabbed onto my arms and pulled me to my feet.

"Chloe?" He was confused but he wasn't angry. Not at me at least. His eyes were warm and he held my hand while he waited for me to explain why I'd stopped him.

He really had no idea. He trusted me completely. It never crossed his mind that I'd been lying to him too, even worse than Rosalie had. Moisture welled up in my eyes, and no amount of effort could have stopped the tears that spilled over.

"What is it?" he asked concerned.

I inhaled a shaky breath and then I told him everything.

"Why?" He asked, as he raked his hand through his hair, "Why didn't you just tell me?"

"I was afraid that you wouldn't like who I was. I was afraid that I wouldn't be good enough for you."

"What have I ever done to make you think that?!" He yelled, his voice harder and colder than I'd ever known.

"After you saw her, all you could talk about was how beautiful she was." I answered meekly.

"I thought she was you! You were the most beautiful person in the world to me. You could have been three feet tall and missing both arms and it wouldn't have mattered. It never would have mattered! I fell in love with you! Not your face, not your body, you!"

"I know that now." I whispered.

"Do you know how bad it hurt to think that you had found someone else? Do you know how much it tore me apart when I thought I was falling for another girl, when all I wanted to do was hold on to you? Do you have any idea what you put me through?! And for what? Because you had some pre-conceived notion that all I cared about was your appearance."

"I didn't mean to…I—I didn't know you felt that way." I cried.

"How could you not, when I spent every single night that we talked telling you how much I cared about you?"

I didn't have an answer for him. It was easy to see that now. At the time it wasn't so clear.

Edward was crying too now. He wiped his hand across his face to remove the tears that had spilled out of his eyes and leaked onto his cheeks.

"Do you know what hurts the most?" He continued, "Not that you've been lying to me pretty much since the day we met, having to admit that kills me, but its not the worst thing about this. What hurts the most is that you couldn't trust that my feelings for you were real. Even after everything I said to you, how could you believe that I was so shallow and petty that all I would care about are your looks? I thought you knew me better than that."

"Edward I'm so sorry." I choked out.

"You're always sorry. It's not good enough this time."

"Edward please don't do this." I begged.

He shook his head back and forth and in a tone of voice that was disconnected from any strain of emotion he told me, "I want you to stay away from me. Do not call me. Do not text me. Do not write me. Do not email me." He slid into his car before I had a chance to react and sped out of the parking lot.

* * *

I was awakened by the alarm on my clock/radio Saturday morning. Any other Saturday, I would have hopped out of bed, brushed my teeth, pulled on some comfortable clothes and headed over to the library to read for a few hours.

Not today.

As soon as I got home last night, I climbed into my bed and went to sleep praying that I would never have to wake up. The buzzing of my alarm only reminded me that I would have to endure one more day of my miserable life without Edward.

I grabbed the clock/radio off my bed stand and yanked it as hard as I could. I pulled the cord out of the wall and one it stopped buzzing, I used all my strength to chuck the horrid machine at the floor.

"Have you lost your mind?"

"Leave me alone Rosalie, I'm not in the mood to spend my morning arguing with you."

"Morning? Bella it's 6:00 at night."

"What?" I sat up in my bed and gaped at Rosalie, who was wearing a full face of make-up and had her hair pinned up in rollers.

"You've been asleep all day. You were out cold when I got up this morning, so I reset your alarm to give you a couple more hours to sleep. When it went off the second time, I just set the thing to 6 o clock."

"Thanks I guess." I said. I collected a handful of my hair and focused on twisting it around in knots to let Rosalie know I was done interacting with her.

It didn't work. She came and sat down on the edge of my bed. She lightly touched the back of my hand with her fingers and said, "Hey, what happened last night."

None of your business. 

"Nothing, why do you ask?" I said as casually as I could.

"Oh Bella, can you just stop and have a straight conversation with me for once. Edward was here this morning."

I dropped my hands away from my hair and looked at Rosalie with wide eyes. She knew she had me.

"You left your backpack in his car last night; he stopped by to drop it off."

I felt my heart drop into the pit of my stomach. He was here. He had to know how desperately I needed to see him again and he didn't ask her to wake me up?

I had a million questions for her. I went with the one that was simplest and would give me the most information. "Did he say anything…about me?"

"NOPE, you first." She said, "What happened."

I told her everything that happened last night, minus the time with Emmett and the plan we had concocted to seduce Edward.

"I knew it!" She exclaimed. "He wouldn't even look at me this morning. When I answered the door, he handed me your backpack and he told me, 'the same thing I told her goes for you too Rosalie' and then he left."

It really was over. I laid back down on my bed and turned onto my side so that my back was to Rose.

"Bella…"

"I already know Rose. You told me this would happen. You were right and I was wrong. You're always right, just leave me alone."

Then, Rosalie did something I didn't expect. I'll never understand why she did it, but I was forever thankful to her. She climbed into the bed behind me, she wrapped her arms around me, and she held me while I cried.

"Bella" She whispered after a while. "Can I tell you something?" She continued to stroke my hair while she waited for me to answer. I nodded, giving her confirmation to continue.

"I never meant for things to happen with Edward the way they did. I had every intention of helping you, you have to know that. Jealousy is such a strange thing. I've never had to share anyone before. I've never had to fight for anyone's attention. I'm used to getting what I want, when I say I want it. With Edward it wasn't that way. I didn't realize how jealous I was until it was too late.

"At the club, when you left Edward and me alone together, he said the most amazing things to me. Guys tell me I'm beautiful all the time, but no one has ever told me how smart I was before, or how nice I was, or how much they enjoyed just talking to me. I knew that he was saying these things for you, but I couldn't understand why he wouldn't be saying them to me. And for a while, I really thought that he thought I was different. I actually thought it was possible for someone to appreciate me as more than just a pretty face.

"But I was wrong. When we were together all he ever wanted to talk about was you, your hobbies, your family, your favorite books. Any time I tried to mention something else he would look at me like I was from another planet. It was then that I knew, that no matter how hard I tried, I would never compare to you in his mind.

"It made me angry that I was going out of my way to make him like me and you didn't even have to try. And then I started to become jealous of him too.

"I've known you for two years, he's known you for two weeks and you've already spent so much more time with him than you ever have with me. I know you and I don't have much in common Bella, but I don't have many friends. You are the only person, other than my parents of course, who has been there for me when I needed it. I couldn't let him steal you away from me, so I did everything I could to keep you apart."

I wanted to scream at her. I wanted to pull out her hair and punch her in the arm but at the moment I didn't have the energy, physically or emotionally to do either, so I laid there quietly in her arms, and let the new wave of tears that came upon hearing Rosalie's confessions wash all the anger out of my body.

"It will be okay," She said, "you're better off without him anyway."

"Rosalie I love him." I whispered.

"I'm sorry," She said, after a long pause, "I didn't know."

"And now it's too late." I cried "He doesn't want to see me anymore. He will never know."

Rosalie sat up, and pulled on my arm, yanking me with her. "Okay, that's enough of this. Get up and get dressed, were going to have some fun now."

"Rosalie I don't want to—"

"I'm not taking no for an answer! We can do this the easy way, or the hard way, take your pick."

Again, I didn't have the energy or the motivation to argue with her, so I complied with her request.

I did feel a little bit better after I took a shower. I pulled on one of the outfits that Emmett had picked for me at the mall yesterday. Rosalie did my make-up. She straightened my hair and pulled it into an elegant side swept ponytail.

It was around 9:30p when we arrived at the party. Sharon lived in one of the few older two story houses in Tucson, Az. Her family built the house in the 70's on a plot of land in the desert about 15 miles outside of city limits on the north east side of Town. Perfect for parties, Rosalie had said. There was no one around for miles so Sharon never had to worry about noise complaints from the neighbors when she threw one of these things.

I'd never been to a house party before and I didn't know what to expect. To my pleasure the house, wasn't stuffy and overly crowded like the club was. It was really kind of mellow. They had turned the kitchen into an open bar, and the majority of the house guests were hovering around the kitchen and dining area. Those that weren't hovering around the alcohol were scattered through out the living room and back patio.

"This isn't so bad." I said to Rosalie.

"It's still early." She responded, "Come on." Rosalie grabbed my hand and led me to the kitchen/bar area. No shock there.

"You want something?" She asked.

"No I'm okay."

She shrugged her shoulders and mixed herself a drink in one of those red plastic cups.

"We're going to have a good time right?" She asked. I nodded, although I knew I was lying. I was really just trying to make it through the night.

"Emmett should be here soon." She said, "Do you see anyone you know?"

"No." I responded.

Rosalie scanned the crowd and I spaced out while she gossiped about several people that she recognized from school.

"Oh my God Bella look!" Her voice was urgent enough that I actually made an effort to look up and see what had her so excited.

At first I thought my eyes were playing tricks on me. I couldn't believe that he would come here after what happened last night.

If it wasn't for Rosalie, I would be at home in bed right now crying my eyes out. When Edward left me last night, he was even more distraught than I was so this was the last place I expected to see him.

"I'm sorry Bella, I didn't know he would be here. We can leave if you want."

"I'll be right back." Told her and made my way across the room towards Edward. I was pretty sure that he didn't want to see me and even more sure that he didn't want to talk to me, but I didn't care. I would probably never see him again. I would never get another chance to tell him how I felt about him.

He didn't react once he saw me approach. His face was carefully composed into an emotionless mask, and it was impossible to figure out what he was thinking.

"Edward, Hey." I said nervously.

"Hi." A tall voluptuous blonde stepped into view beside Edward. She wrapped both her arms around his waist and kissed him on the cheek.

Oh. I hadn't noticed her before. This was awkward. Awkward and uncomfortable. Any ounce of confidence I'd felt before was gone. I wanted to run back to my room and crawl away and die.

"You brought a date." I stammered. It was all I could think to say to him now.

"Who's your friend?" The woman who clung to Edward asked. She glanced at me briefly, and I could tell be the expression on her face that she wasn't impressed by what she saw.

Edward cleared his throat and then he introduced us.

"Tanya, this is Bella, Bella Tanya."

Tanya?! As in his ex-fiancée Tanya. The same Tanya who cheated on him and broke his heart. I couldn't believe it, what was he doing here with her?

"Charmed." She said. Then she giggled and played with his hair. She was a year or two older than Edward and was stunningly beautiful. She had breast implants, and a teeny tiny waist, which gave her an hour-glass figure.

In one of the many conversations that I had with Edward, he'd told me that they'd grown apart, because although they were attracted to each other physically, they didn't really connect intellectually. About two weeks after they'd broken up, Tanya tried to get Edward to take her back. She'd cried and begged and pleaded with him to give her another chance. He told her he couldn't.

I always thought that he said no to a second chance with Tanya because he was looking for a relationship that went deeper than what he had with her, a relationship that was based on more than just sex. Apparently I was wrong.

She flaunted him right in front of me, constantly touching him and rubbing her big fake breasts against his body. And he was letting her!

"You know Edward, you're right. I have no idea where I could have possibly gotten the impression that you are the least bit superficial." I said sarcastically, then I pivoted on my heel and stormed away from him.

I rushed back to the spot where I was standing with Rosalie prior to going to talk to Edward and she was no where in sight. Of course she wouldn't wait for me to get back. I imagined that Emmett probably showed up they were off in a broom closet somewhere making out.

"It's not what you think." Edward strolled up from behind me behind me and whispered into my ear. I spun around and glared at him.

"It's not? So you're telling me that you didn't come to this party with your ex girlfriend who lied and cheated on you and betrayed your trust one day after you broke up with me for pretty much the same reason?"

"What Tanya did isn't even remotely similar to what you did and you know it."

"You're right I would never cheat on you." I said angrily.

"And don't forget we were never dating." He shot back, "You never gave me that chance."

"You're such a hypocrite." I said softly, after a few seconds of silence passed between us.

"Look Bella…" Edward started, but then was interrupted.

We were approached by a young guy, who looked to be close to my age. He was about 5'9 with dishwater blonde hair and brown eyes.

"Hey, looking good Swan." He said.

"Do I know you?" I asked somewhat curious, but mostly irritated that he'd interrupted my conversation with Edward. He looked vaguely familiar to me, but then so did a lot of people.

"Yeah, we have Biology lab together. I'm James remember."

"Oh yeah." I said.

There were 40 people in that class and I didn't really remember him at all. I hoped that if he thought I did the conversation would end there. It didn't.

"I never expected to see you here," James continued, "You don't really seem like the partying type." He chuckled, "Can I get you a drink or something?"

"No. That won't be necessary," Edward answered for me, "She doesn't drink."

Excuse me? Last I checked Edward Cullen didn't want anything to do with me. In fact, he had moved on rather quickly with skanky ex girlfriend. He had no right to dictate what I did with my time and who I did it with.

"Oh I don't?" I challenged. "Really Edward, I though you knew me better than that." I mocked, throwing his words from yesterday back at him.

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A/N: Sorry for the cliff-hanger. Trust me it is much much better to end this chapter here. Next Chapter will be the rest of the party.


	5. Chapter 5

**Disclaimer: **I own none of the characters in this story.

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A/N: Links to this chapter are in my profile. The story is almost over, so the next chapter will probably be the last one :( I was going to combine it with this one but it got too long. Thanks to everyone who has been reading this story and reviewing. I appreciate you. Now...Chapter 5!

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I knew I should have stayed home. At least at home, the only emotions I had to deal with were depression self loathing and rejection. Now I could add embarrassment, jealousy, and frustration to that list.

On top of everything I was angry. I was angry that Edward was here with Tanya. I was angry that he didn't want to see me anymore. I was angry that Rosalie brought me here so that I could experience first hand just how over me he was.

I wanted to scream! I was normally a peaceful person, but tonight I wanted to do nothing more than to find Tanya and rip her hair out.

Too bad the chances of me getting away with that without having to face any repercussions was slim to none.

James was offering me of a somewhat acceptable alternative. He was offering me a chance to drown all my feelings away until I felt numb and dull.

So I took him up on his offer. I would get drunk tonight and James would be my catalyst. The fact that my actions would spite Edward was just an added bonus. What I really wanted was to be so impaired that I would forget everything about this awful night.

I allowed James to steer me away from Edward and into the kitchen. It was a beautiful kitchen, very modern looking with slick black appliances, cream colored walls, and granite floors to match the counters. An island separated the kitchen from its adjacent dining room.

There were two large coolers on the floor near the sink which I assumed held canned beer and soda, and large selection of liquor and wine bottles set on top of the counters.

"So what'll it be?" He asked.

_No idea._

Edward was right of course. I didn't really drink. It was a rare occasion and only under extreme circumstances (I think tonight would count). The reason being for one, I didn't like the taste of alcohol too much, and more importantly, it didn't take much to get me drunk.

The last time I'd had an alcoholic beverage was this past summer. I had a glass of champagne at a wedding. I felt fine at first, a little warmer than usual, and a little lightheaded but otherwise I was good. But as soon as I stood up from my table the whole room tilted sideways. I took one step and fell crashing to the ground. I went home that night with a bruised elbow and a twisted ankle.

I cringed at the memory, while at the same time trying to smile and appear confident in front of James.

"Surprise me." I said, "The stronger the better." It would be better to get this over with quickly. If I only had to endure one or 2 drinks to achieve what I wanted that would be perfectly fine.

James went to work then, pulling bottles off the counter and mixing a variety of different liquids into the cups he'd set out for us.

"Here you go." He said as he handed me one of the plastic red cups. He raised his cup in the air and said, "Cheers!"

I lifted my cup the same way James had.

_Wow._ It was very strong. The smell of it alone caused my throat to constrict. I almost changed my mind. Almost.

James swallowed his drink in one long gulp and was staring at me, waiting for me to do the same.

I can do this. I chanted over and over in my head, mentally psyching myself up to ingest whatever drink James has concocted.

I took a deep breath.

Here goes nothing.

"Cheers!"

_To Edward._

And then I poured the contents of the cup down my throat.

_Arrgg!_

It was the grossest thing I'd ever tasted! It felt like I had just swallowed a lump of hot coal doused in vinegar. My throat was on fire! And it wouldn't go away. I had to bite down on my bottom lip to restrain myself from spitting my drink out all over James. I closed my eyes and forced the stuff down my throat.

I did it. It was awful, and a little painful, but I did it. The drink had the desired effect. I felt warm and fuzzy and my muscles immediately began to relax. When you put your mind to it…

"Good?" James asked.

Are you crazy? The drink was terrible, but it was a means to an end.

"Oh Great, remind me to send you a thank you note in the morning." I said sarcastically rolling my eyes.

James laughed and then said, "Man, I'm starting to think your boyfriend is right about you being a lightweight."

"Huh?"

Okay. I can't be sure, but I _think _he was making fun of me. There was no way it was that obvious that…wait a second.

"He is not my boyfriend!" I corrected.

"Okay okay." James said, at the same time holding his hands up to show he meant a truce. "Then how about another?"

I answered his question by handing him my empty cup. I was surprised that it took some effort to line up the plastic cylinder with James' hand. My arm felt like it was detached from my body and I couldn't get it to cooperate, like a young child trying to insert a square peg into a triangle shaped hole.

After a few (unsuccessful) attempts, James grabbed onto my wrist and took the cup from me.

He mixed another drink.

The liquid went down easier this time.

Had I been in my right mind, I'd have gone to look for Rosalie and demanded that she take me home. Instead I hung around James for a good portion of the night. I was the social butterfly I'd never been while I was sober. I was funny, and witty, and charming. I giggled, and joked and mingled with James and his friends.

The night was going good, and I was feeling good. It felt amazing to let go of all my reservations and just live in the moment. I felt so light and free.

I was acting as referee for an intense game of beer pong (a drinking game where you have to bounce a ping pong ball across the table into the other person's cups. If you score they take a drink and vice versa) in the dining room between a tall brown haired guy and an average looking read head. I couldn't remember if they were James' friends or if we'd met them here at the party.

After several rounds of hitting the ping pong ball back and forth, and back and forth, the read head, knocked the ball into his opponent's cup.

"Whoo hoo! Alright!" I yelled, and threw my hands up in the air. I was also doubling as cheerleader apparently.

James strolled over to where I was standing and draped his arm over my shoulders. "Having fun?"

I nodded in affirmation.

"Me too….Do you know what would make tonight even better?" He asked.

_No. _Another drink maybe.

And then before I could answer he leaned in to kiss me.

It took me a minute to figure out what he was doing. My reflexes were a little slow tonight to say the least. Fortunately I managed to drop my head and turn away just in time. His lips connected with my forehead.

His friend, the read head, yelled " BURN!" and started laughing hysterically.

_Awkward!_

James moved away from me and smiled. He seemed to be cool with what transpired between us, even if he did look a little uncomfortable.

This has to be a joke, I thought. We were in one of the least romantic settings on the planet surrounded by his 2 drunken friends and a room full of strangers. Not to mention that I'd given him no inclination that I was romantically interested in him. There was no way he could have been serious that kiss.

And then I started laughing too. The more I thought about the situation, the funnier it got.

James didn't look amused anymore.

I took a few deep breaths to try and get my laughter under control.

A few more.

And then I started laughing hysterically again.

"So…um… yeah! I'll be back." I said between giggles.

I didn't know where I was going until I ended up in the kitchen. "Technically" I didn't need another drink, but I seemed like the appropriate thing to do.

I had every intention of making myself something fabulous and exotic. Didn't happen. I grabbed the first bottle I saw of the counter and combined it with plain old coke. That in itself was a task. I was still feeling silly and I kept knocking things over.

I saw Edward approach out of the corner of my eye. I chose to ignore him. "Finally." I murmured to myself when I'd completed my task. Not bad.

"What do you think your doing?!"

"I'm getting trashed man, isn't that what you're supposed to do at a party?" I laughed.

"No! Not you. You shouldn't be drinking."

"I can make my own decisions. I'm not a child." I said coolly. And I was tired of him yelling at me and bossing me around.

I stared directly at Edward, daring him to interfere, as I lifted the glass to my lips. Rage flickered across his face as I took a deep breath and poured the liquid down my throat.

"Cheers." I smiled. "Lighten up. You're being way too serious."

I moved past Edward and went back to my newly acquired group of friends.

"You!" I said, pointing at James. "Where have you been?"

"Right here?" He said looking puzzled.

"That's right!" I exclaimed, happy again now that I had figured out the answer to my question.

Lightweight? Ha! I could hang in there with the best of them. I'd had one more drink than James and I was feeling just…

"Oh my gosh!" I exclaimed. The top 40 CD that spun in the stereo was no playing Disturbed's Stricken. Suddenly I had an epiphany!

"We have to dance!" I said to James and then stumbled through crowds of people before he could respond.

The family room of Sharon's house was set up for dancing. It held two sofa's a coffee table, and the stereo. The sofa's had been pushed back against the wall to allow space for the homemade dance floor.

I climbed onto the sofa, stood up on the cushions, and willed my limbs to move to the music.

….. _Another hole in the wall of my inner defenses__  
Leaving me breathless, the reason I know_

_That I am stricken and can't let you go  
When the heart is cold, there's no hope, and we know  
That I am crippled by all that you've done  
Into the abyss will I run, Into the abyss will I run_…

I was _such_ a good dancer. Everyone was watching me because that's how good I was. I tried to show off a bit by doing a cute little twirl. My heel got stuck on the fabric of the couch and I fell. I landed halfway over the arm of the couch and bumped my head against the wall.

_Ouch._

I hope nobody saw that. I pushed myself up and twisted my body around so I was sitting on the couch.

"Really Bella? Really?" An irate female voice scolded.

Now she shows up.

"Where were you?" I yelled at Rose. She was standing by the edge of the couch, towering over me. Emmett was standing next to her and there was someone else staring at me from over Emmett's shoulder.

"Oh Um, Emmett got lost so I went out front to flag him down. I hope you're not mad. I told him what happened last night and we talked for a bit and then we—uh got a little pre-occupied." She smiled sheepishly. Bella who's your friend?"

I strained my neck so I could get a better look.

_Oh._

"This…ah…this is—_wait don't tell me_—"

"James."

That's right! That's who was standing behind Emmett.

"A few more seconds and I would have had it."

Rosalie looked at me bewildered.

"Bella! Are you drunk?" She asked while she glared at me through narrowed eyes.

"No way!" Emmett said, grinning at me. "Way to go dude." Emmett raised his hand in the air, eliciting a hi-5 from James. "I thought I'd never see the day."

"I'm not drunk." I responded defensively. I wasa little tipsy _maybe_, but not drunk.

"Look at me." Rosalie said as she kneeled down in front of me on one knee and grabbed me by the shoulders. Wow, I'd never noticed before that she had such beautiful eyes. The eye make-up she was wearing really made them stand out. So blue…

"Oh My Gosh you're totally drunk! What happened? I though you were going to talk to…well you know."

That's right. The last time she'd seen me I was on my way to talk to Edward and declare my undying love for him. I was too late. He'd moved on.

"That didn't work out." I said defensively. "But it's okay now, because I have James." So there!

Rosalie gave James an odd look, almost like she was mad at him for something.

"Bella you know I'm the last person to tell you what to do but— Emmett! What the hell!"

While Rose and I were engaged in conversation, Emmett had moseyed on over to the stereo and changed the disc in the CD player. The intro to N'Sync's "It's Gonna Be Me" blasted through the speakers.

"Yeah." He yelled, bobbing his head up and down, "Now it's a party!"

"Umm…has he been drinking?" I whispered to Rose.

"Not a drop." She sighed. I looked back at Emmett who was now pumping his fists in the air and doing pelvic thrusts.

"Oh No! People are staring. Sorry Bella, I have to go take care of this! Be careful. Don't do anything I wouldn't do." Rosalie said before she stood up and charged towards Emmett.

James slid into the space next to me on the couch and wrapped his arm around my shoulders.

"You didn't get to dance." I sighed.

"It's okay," James responded, "As long as you promise to make it up to me later."

"Of course!" I smiled, "I really liked that song and Emmett had to go and change it."

"I can play it for you sometime." James stated.

"Really?! You play?"

"Yeah, on guitar hero."

Before I had time to question that, James added "You know, Bella I've always had a crush on you since that first day you walked into class."

"Oh yeah." I responded not really listening.

The music in the room went back to the Top 40 mix that was playing earlier. I assumed Rosalie managed to pull Emmett away from the stereo. I glanced over my shoulder to look for them, and as I suspected, they were no longer there. I wonder where they went?

"Yeah," James continued, "I always wanted to talk to you, I just never knew what to say before…"

Okay, who do we have here…guy talking on cell phone… girl fighting with her boyfriend…couple making out on the stairs, eww…guy in red shirt dancing…girl in blue shirt dancing…Tanya…_Tanya!_

She was standing in the corner of the living room talking to a guy who was definitely not Edward. She had Edward back all of 2 hours and she was already cheating on him. _Again._ And he broke my heart for _her?!_ She's not going to get away with this!

I gripped James' shoulder and used it as a vault to prop myself up to a standing position. Then without saying a word to him I climbed over his legs and walked away from him.

I moved towards Tanya.

"Lose your date much?" I shouted angrily when I reached her.

Tanya turned away from her newest victim, to look at me over her shoulder. "What?" She asked as she tucked a strand of hair behind her ear and smiled at me in a condescending way. She didn't take me seriously. Well she would.

"Edward one of the nicest, sweetest, most trusting people I know. Why would you do this to him?" I made a hand motion toward the guy she was talking to.

Tanya looked at her male friend, and then she laughed. "You have no idea what is going on do you?"

"I know exactly what is going on! I don't like it. And I don't like you! I hate you!"

You're a horrible drunk." She said dismissively, and then she turned her back to me and focused all of her attention on her new boyfriend.

"I am not Drunk!" I shouted. "I am looking out for Edward. Do you know how much this is going to hurt him?!"

Tanya twisted so that she was facing me head on. She was at least 5 inches taller than me and to be honest, a little scary, but I wasn't going to back down.

"You should be one to talk." She said coldly, "You've hurt him more than I ever could. I've never seen him so low and it's all your fault."

As if I needed another reason to hate her.

"You're a liar!" I replied, "If it wasn't for you Edward and I would be together right now!"

"Listen honey, I had nothing to do with your little break up. So why don't you grow up and start taking some responsibility for yourself."

"You have everything to do with it. You are the reason he can't trust anyone anymore. _You_ are the reason he won't forgive me. Because deep down, he is afraid that I, or any other girl he is with for that matter, will turn out to be a slut just like you."

Tanya glowered at me through narrowed eyes. She jabbed her finger at me and said, "Now you wait a minute—"

"Don't touch me!" I yelled and at the same time slapped her hand away from my face.

"Tanya!" a cold menacing voice scolded from behind me. Edward's voice.

Tanya took a step toward me and came so close that we were nearly touching. My hand balled into a fist in preparation to defend myself against Tanya.

Before either of us could make a move, Edward wrapped his arm across my stomach and pulled me away from her.

"Let me go!" I shouted.

"Yeah Edward let her go. It was her own stupidity that put her in this situation, let her get herself out of it."

_That's it!_

I did everything I could to get around Edward. I tried to pull his arm away. I tried to jump over him and go around him.

Tanya laughed, enraging me more.

Edward glared at her, and then he lifted me off the ground and carried me away until we were out of hearing range of the crowd that had gathered around us.

"Why are you doing this?" He asked angry, as he set me down in the hallway.

"Why are you?" That's right, better to answer his question with another question than to let him see how much him hanging around with Tanya really bothered me.

Edward groaned, frustrated.

"Bella…I—I'm concerned about you. You are going to get yourself hurt. I don't like you drinking. And definitely not with him."

"Something wrong with my friend James." I said sarcastically.

"I don't trust him. You just met and he's already trying to get you drunk!"

"So what! You are here with Tanya! Do you know how I feel about that?"

Seeing them together made me want to scratch my eyeballs out.

"She was all over you Edward! _All_ over you didn't do one thing to stop it! Are you _trying_ to make me jealous? Did you want to hurt my feelings? If so it worked. I hope you're happy now."

There! Now I was feeling bad again. All the emotions I worked so hard to repress came flooding back to the surface.

"Hey there you are? I wondered where you'd gone off to." James said as he curled around the corner into the hallway where Edward had taken me to get away from Tanya. Edward glared at James like he wanted to murder him.

"Well you found me." I said. My voice was shaky and I could feel myself getting close to tears.

"Thirsty?" He said, smiling deviously. It was a blatantly obvious attempt to steer me away from Edward, and right now it was what I wanted.

"Parched."

I glanced at Edward who looked forlorn and sadder than I'd ever seen him. My first reaction was to grab his hand and apologize to him for….

NO! He didn't care about my feeling so why should I care about his.

I brushed past Edward and went with James.

This time he only filled my cup about half way with one of the beverages. Tequila? I though it said, but couldn't be to sure. The letters on the bottle were starting to blur and muddle together. Well at least the room wasn't spinning. Yet.

James handed me the shot and he grabbed himself a soda.

Okay, so maybe James did have less then noble motives for wanting me to drink with him. It didn't matter anyway.

I held the drink in my hand and before I could do anything with it, another hand snatched it away from me. "Why don't you let me have this one?" Edward said and then slammed the cup on the counter.

"Wh—what are…?" I was confused.

"Dance with me!" He ordered, then he held on to my elbow and pulled me away from James.

Edward stormed through the house. I had nearly had to run to keep up with his pace and tripped over my feet a couple of times. He led me to the back of the house, through a sliding glass door and onto the patio.

We were the only two people outside. Sharon had a pool, which was fenced off and covered up, and a stone bar-b-que grill at the far end of the yard. The music from the stereo cascaded down on us as clearly as if we'd still been inside.

"Are you following me?" I asked quizzically.

For someone who didn't want to see me anymore, we seemed to be running into each other a lot tonight.

Edward released my elbow and his hands fell limply by his sides. "Don't be absurd." He said, and then his gaze caught mine and he stared into my eyes.

I'm not sure how long we stood there gazing at each other, or what he saw when he looked at me.

His facial expression grew soft and warm almost. For the first time since Edward told me that he didn't want to see me anymore, I felt like things might turn out okay between us.

"So this is different. Why…" I was the first one to speak and the first one to look away. I wanted to ask him why he brought me out here with him. I wanted to find out why he cared what I did with James, but I didn't. I was afraid it would make him angry again.

"The last thing I wanted to do was hurt you." Edward stated. He held out held out his hand for me. I reach out, but right before my hand touched his I hesitated. Edward closed the remaining distance between our hands as he grabbed it and held it in his. He placed brought his other hand to rest lightly on my waist.

_Turn the lights off in this place__  
And she shines just like a star…_

Edward rocked us slowly from side to side to the music (Ne-Yo's Closer) that was coming out of the stereo.

_  
And I swear I know her face  
I just don't know who you are_

"I thought…I thought you didn't want to see me anymore." I whispered. I still couldn't look at him so I stared at our hands as I spoke.

_Turn the music up in here__  
I still hear her loud and clear  
Like she's right there in my ear  
Telling me  
That she wants to own me_

"Didn't I tell you how hard it is for me to stay away from you?" He whispered back. His hand slipped from the side of my waist to the middle of my back.

_To control me_

Then he cautiously pulled my body against his. I laid my head on his chest and listened to the rhythm of his heartbeat.

_Come closer_

"That's a good thing." I murmured to myself. I didn't want to be away from him either.

_Come closer_

_  
_"You never let me explain." He freed the hand that was holding onto mine and began brushing his fingers up and down my arm.

_And I just can't pull myself away__  
Under a spell I can't break_

_I just can't stop__  
I just can't stop  
I just can't stop  
I just can't stop_

"I came here alone. The only reason I came at all was because I hoped that maybe you'd be here."

_  
And I just can't bring myself no way  
But I don't want to escape_

_"_Tanya… I ran into her here she—"

_I just can't stop__  
I just can't stop  
I just can't stop  
I just can't stop  
I just can't stop_

"Shh…" I knew I would eventually have to face whatever went on between them, I refused to do this now. Not when I didn't know if I would ever see him again after tonight. I slid my hands up his chest, over his shoulders, and locked my arms around his neck.

_  
I can feel her on my skin  
I can taste her on my tongue_

"Please Edward, not now…" For the first time since we started dancing I looked into his eyes. "Right now I just want to be close to you."

_  
She's the sweetest taste of sin_

Edward wrapped both of his arms around my waist and held me tightly. I tightened my grip on his neck, afraid he would disappear if I let go.

_  
The more I get the more I want_

"Why did you have to lie to me; all I ever wanted was to be with you."

_She wants to own me_

"I'm sorry…"

_Come closer_

_She says "come closer"_

"Please don't push me away again." I said, my voice barely above a whisper.

_And I just can't pull myself away  
Under a spell I can't break  
I just can't stop  
I just can't stop  
I just can't stop  
I just can't stop_

"I don't think I could even if I wanted to."

_  
And I just can't bring myself no way  
But I don't want to escape  
I just can't stop  
I just can't stop  
I just can't stop  
I just can't stop  
I just can't stop_

"I haven't been able to sleep, I haven't been able to think, I'm going crazy being away from you."

_  
Come closer_

_Come Closer_

_Come Closer_

_Come Closer_

Edward leaned down and whispered against my ear, "I think…

_I just can't stop nooooo__  
I just can't stop nooooo_

_I just can't stop nooooo_

_I just can't stop nooooo  
_

_"_No. I know…I'm falling in love with you."

If the room wasn't spinning before it was now.

"Edward I…" I was starting to feel sick.

"Hey, you don't look so good." He said as he leaned back just enough to get a good look at my face.

Edward kept one arm wrapped around my shoulders, and helped me to sit down on the edge of the concrete patio. Once I was securely seated he sat down next to me. "Did you drive here?" he asked.

"No I came with Rose, she drove." I responded weakly.

"I'll find her." He said as he stood up.

"Edward wait!" I panicked, "I never got…I never got to tell you I love you."

"I know you do." He smiled. "I promise I will be back." He stroked my hair once before he went back into the house.

* * *

A/N: Please R&R


	6. Chapter 6

Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters in this story; i just make them do what I want :) A/N: This is the last chapter of the actual story. Next chapter will be a short epilogue.

* * *

**_Last Chapter: _**

_Edward leaned down and whispered against my ear, "I think…_

_I just can't stop nooooo  
I just can't stop nooooo_

_"No. I know…I'm falling in love with you." _

_If the room wasn't spinning before it was now._

_"Edward I…" I was starting to feel sick._

_"Hey, you don't look so good." He said as he leaned back just enough to get a good look at my face._

_Edward kept one arm wrapped around my shoulders, and helped me to sit down on the edge of the concrete patio. Once I was securely seated he sat down next to me. "Did you drive here?" he asked._

_"No I came with Rose, she drove." I responded weakly._

_"I'll find her." He said as he stood up._

_"Edward wait!" I panicked, "I never got…I never got to tell you I love you."_

_"I know you do." He smiled. "I promise I will be back." He stroked my hair once before he went back into the house. _

_

* * *

_

_He's coming back._

I pulled my legs to my chest and wrapped my arms around them. Tonight was arguably one of the single worst nights of my existence, until 5 minutes ago.

5 minutes ago Edward said he loved me.

He loves me. And I love him… _maybe, _after tonight, he would be able to forgive me…

A wave of nausea rolled through my body before I had a chance to explore my thoughts any further.

I shut my eyes and rested my head on my knees.

That seemed to help a little with the dizziness, but my head was throbbing and stomach continued to flip.

I knew what was coming next. The last thing I wanted was to end the night lying face down in the lawn in a pile of vomit.

No, I recalled there being a bathroom in the hall near the kitchen. It'd taken Edward less than two minutes to drag me from there to the back patio where I was now. It couldn't be too far away.

I needed to get back inside.

I rolled on my knees, took a deep breath, and used all my strength to push off the ground, climb to my feet, and stumble towards the house.

The jerkiness of the movements didn't help my stomach. I ground my teeth together and threw open the sliding glass door.

The door opened to bedroom. To my left, and less than three feet away from where I stood was a bathroom. On the other side of the room directly across from me was a door that led to the rest of the house.

All the lights were off and this room was vacant. I got the feeling that this room was off limits. For a second, I thought that maybe I would be able to make it out the door and into the hall bathroom.

I was wrong.

I clamped my hand over my mouth, bolted into the bathroom and slung the door shut behind me, not even bothering to turn on the light, and fell to my knees in front of the toilet.

The throbbing inside my head became more painful and pronounced the longer I stayed convulsing in front of the toilet. When I couldn't stand it anymore, I ripped the rubber band out of my hair, and used my fingers to rake out all the bobby pins.

The whole process of throwing up left me physically drained. When I was done, I closed the lid on the toilet and rested my head against the cool white porcelain. I was too tired to get up, too tired to move. My eyelids were heavy and it became harder and harder to hold on to consciousness…

"Bella!"

Hmm.

I was on the cusp of falling asleep. I should have opened my eyes, or called out, or responded in some kind of way, but I couldn't.

I couldn't do make my body do anything but lay there. I needed to sleep.

"Bella are you in there?"

_Go away!_

The door clicked open.

The light turned on.

.

"So this is where you've been hiding."

I wasn't as concerned as I should have been that someone entered the bathroom with me. I knew this voice. It was familiar to me and not one that could be ignored.

"Rosalie?" I groaned.

"Yes, it's me…wow Bella, have a little too much to drink tonight?"

I couldn't tell if she was being sarcastic or not. I wasn't interested enough in what she was saying to care.

"Bella look at me." She said. Her voice sounded much closer than it was a second ago. I forced myself to open my eyes. Rosalie was kneeling beside me.

"Why didn't you just stay outside? Edward has been going crazy looking for you, and he's been driving me crazy," She laughed, "So I figured I better find you fast. I'm going to let him know you're in here so he can drive you home."

"Edward is taking me home?" I questioned groggily.

My mind was in a haze and all my memories of the night were starting to blur into one, but one thing I was certain of was that Edward was coming back. The reason he left at all was to find Rosalie—Rosalie was supposed to take me home.

"Yeah, I know we came here together," Rosalie said, "but I can't take you home right now. I'm meeting up with some people at Nico's (24 hour Mexican food restaurant in Tucson) and I have to get going. Emmett has already left."

"Why?" I whispered as the reality of what Rosalie was trying to say finally hit me. After everything she said about me being her friend she was abandoning me…again, for Emmett…_again!_

"I can't. I would invite you Bella but you're too sick to tag along. You need to go home and go to bed. Besides, I didn't think you would have a problem with Edward driving you home."

"I don't." I responded, the weakness of my voice hiding how truly angry I was.

I didn't care that she made other plans, in fact, I pretty much expected her to. I was livid because I let her trick me into thinking that she cared about me. I thought, after our talk earlier this evening, something in her had changed. I convinced myself that dragging me to this party was Rosalie's way of showing me that she was going to start being more considerate of "the only person who was there for her."

I was a fool.

Nothing had changed.

Rosalie was just as egocentric as always.

It would have taken her all of 20 minutes to drop me off at the dorm and she couldn't even give me that.

Rosalie rose to her feet and said, "Well come on out so Edward can stop worrying about you."

She held her hand out to me, but I didn't take it. I pushed myself away from the toilet and fell back against the wall.

I rubbed my hand across my face. My skin was clammy. Clumps of wet hair stuck to the side of my face where I had been laying on the toilet.

"I look awful." I said hoarsely, "I feel awful. And no, I don't have a problem with Edward taking me home; but you…after all the times I took care of you when you were worse off than I am now, and you can't even give me one night?"

Rosalie's whole demeanor changed from impatiently helpful to angry and defensive.

"It's always about you isn't it?!" She scowled as she crossed her arms in front of her chest, "How many times have I stood up for _you_ when you were too afraid to do it yourself?"

I opened my mouth to speak but no sound came out. I couldn't answer her, because the answer to her question was one, that in my anger, I would never admit.

Rosalie stood up for me a lot. Any time I got asked to do something I didn't want to do but couldn't say no. Every time we went out to eat and I got cheated out of the correct amount of change or they messed up my order. Even with Edward I expected Rosalie to jump in and tell him the truth when I was too afraid to.

The reality was that anytime we were together I relied on her assertiveness to do what I wouldn't do for myself.

"I can guarantee you it's a hell of a lot more times than I've been drunk." She continued. "The world doesn't stop just because you're having a bad night. "I am not going to put my life on hold just because you decided to get wasted."

"Fine. Forget I said anything." I whispered.

"No! At least I can admit when I'm being selfish, but you always act like you're so innocent. You're always the victim so people will feel sorry for you and feel obligated to help you."

I vigorously shook my head back and forth.

_She's wrong. _

I'm not like her.

She's wrong.

"Or maybe it's not and act. Maybe you really don't have a clue. Tonight was supposed to be about us, finally bonding, finally doing something as friends… but I didn't even have time to blink before you bailed on me and ran after Edward. There is _no_ doubt in my mind that if the situation were reversed you wouldn't think twice about pawning me off on Emmett. I care about Emmett just as much as you care about Edward and I will not let you make me feel guilty for spending time with him!"

She slipped out of the bathroom and closed the door before I could say anything else.

I sat on the bathroom floor, stunned and brought close to tears by Rosalie's words.

Rosalie and I had worse fights, but this one hurt the most, because as much as I wanted to deny it, the words she said had a ring of truth to them.

I had been selfish.

I deluded myself into thinking it was Rose who ditched me tonight, but I ran off first, and didn't give Rosalie a second thought until I needed her again.

I'd come to expect that Rosalie would stand up for me, and now that I thought about it, I got angry at her the few times that she didn't.

She wasn't wrong in assuming that I would stick her with Emmett if Edward had been the one to invite me out after the party either.

I probably wouldn't have even put in the effort to look for her the way she had me.

I was so disappointed in myself.

This was not the person I want to be.

I heard the door outside the bathroom slam shut. Either Rosalie just left or Edward had just come in. I assumed the later.

I pulled myself off the bathroom floor. My head was still throbbing. My muscles still felt week, and my memories of this evening were already becoming hazy.

I replayed my conversation with Rosalie over and over again in my head as I walked over to the sink and scrubbed my face in cold water.

I didn't want to forget this. I had been extremely unfair to Rosalie and I needed to set things right between us.

I stepped out of the bathroom when my face was clean and I felt I would at least be able to recall why I needed to apologize to Rosalie in the morning.

"Oh…" I gasped.

I expected Edward would be waiting for me in the bedroom so I was fairly taken aback to see James sitting on the edge of the bed.

"H-hey James." I stammered. I was feeling claustrophobic, being closed up in the room with James. I needed to get out, find Edward, and go home.

Instead of starting up a conversation, I James a week smile as I walked past him on my way to the door.

Before my mind could process what was happening, James hopped of the bed and moved in front of me to block the exit.

"You leaving?" He asked. His words were drawn out, slurred.

"Yeah, I'm not feeling too hot." I responded, and then tried to step around him so I could open the door and get out.

James moved at the same time as I did, preventing me from getting past him.

I tried to go around him a second time. James blocked me again.

This was starting to get very annoying, very fast.

"Come on James, I need to go, my ride is waiting for me." I stated, not even try to hold back the frustration in my voice.

"You still owe me that dance." He said as his eyes roamed over my body.

"Another time huh?" I responded.

I waited for James to move out of the way.

He didn't budge.

I scowled at him then turned around and marched towards the sliding glass door I'd used to first enter the room.

James dashed around and stood in front of me again.

"Leave me alone." I groaned.

I was hot and tired and my patience was running out, so I pushed him.

If I'd tried this on any other night, I wouldn't have been able to move James at all. He was heavier and stronger than I was.

But tonight he'd been drinking, so when I pushed him, he stumbled backwards.

I turned around and bolted for the other door.

I wasn't fast enough.

James grabbed my wrist and used my arm as leverage to yank me back. I crashed against his chest. Before I could move James wrapped both his arms around my waist and held me against him. The smell of his cologne mixed with the scent of alcohol that lingered on his breath made me feel sick all over again.

"You don't want to dance with me?" He persisted.

"No I don't want to dance with you!" I responded angrily while I struggled to get out of his grasp.

Before this moment, I would have never thought James would do anything to harm me. He was my friend tonight when I felt alone and needed someone to be there for me. We were drinking buddies, and we even had a class together. As grabbed the back of my neck with one of his hands and leaned in to kiss me, I knew I had been wrong to think him so innocent.

I turned my head to the side before his lips could reach mine.

I wished Edward were here. I hoped he would come charging through the door and pull James off of me. Rosalie said she would tell Edward I was here, but she was angry when she left, and I wouldn't be surprised if she decided that telling Edward where to find me wasn't worth her time.

If Edward hadn't come for me by now I doubted that he would.

I was alone with James and I was on my own.

"James," I tried reasoning with him, "you're drunk. Just let me go!"

Instead of complying with my request, he tried to kiss me again.

"James! No!" I gasped as I tilted my head down.

"You didn't say no to _him." _James responded. His voice was low, menacing and laced with implications.

I couldn't imagine the things that were going through James' head and I didn't want to stick around to find out.

I fought against him with every ounce of strength I had.

While we struggled, I managed to wedge my hands between my chest and his. I pushed against him hoping I could throw him off balance again.

His hand lost its grip on my neck, allowing me free movement of my upper body. I screamed. I slapped him. I clawed at his face and neck.

James grabbed onto my shoulder in attempt to regain the control he had over my limbs. I pulled away from him and he ripped the front of my dress.

I was almost free. James reached around to grab me again, but this time I didn't let him.

I jammed my index and fore fingers into his eye and scratched my nails down his face.

He cried out, and covered his face with his hands. In his agony, he stumbled away from me.

I ran to the door and fumbled with the handle until I got it open.

I ran out of the room, eager to put as much distance as possible between myself and James. I got peculiar looks everyone I passed, but I didn't stop running until I was certain that James wasn't following me.

I needed to find Edward.

I pushed my hair away from my face and glanced around.

I didn't even know where to begin looking for him.

Fortunately I didn't have to.

Edward found me.

"Bella!" I heard his voice call out to me.

As soon as I looked up, Edward had me wrapped in his arms. He hugged me tight against his chest. I leaned against him, feeling exhausted and finally safe.

"I missed you." I cried.

"I was so worried." He said, and then planted kisses all over my face.

He stopped when he reached my cheeks.

They were wet. I'd been crying, though I couldn't remember when the tears started.

"Where were you? I was so scared." I whispered.

"Me too." He said, "When Rosalie said she hadn't seen you, I thought you might have decided to walk home on your own, so I drove around looking for you. When I realized I'd gone farther than you could have possibly gotten by walking, I came back to search the house — Hey, are you okay? You're shaking."

Edward took a step back and the first time since we were reunited he really looked at me. His eyes narrowed into dark slits and his face hardened when his gaze fell upon my torn dress.

"Where is he!" He demanded in a cold menacing voice that sent chills down my spine.

He didn't wait for an answer.

He nearly knocked me down as he tried to charge past me.

"Edward No!" I held on to his arm for dear life and shook my head back and forth.

I hated James for what he did and deep down inside I wanted him to suffer for what he did to me, but I didn't want anyone else to get hurt tonight, least of all Edward.

"Please don't leave me again," I begged, "I just want to forget about him…_please_ just take me home. I just want to go home."

Edward glowered at me, his jaw set, his muscles tense. I didn't know if he heard me. I was positive that any second, he would shake me off his arm and hunt down James.

But then somehow, he managed to pull back from all the rage that was boiling beneath his veins. His expression softened, his muscles relaxed.

"Okay." He said, "I'll take you home."

I didn't remember much after that; falling asleep in Edward's car, Edward carrying me to my room, changing out of my dress, and finally Edward tucking me into bed.

* * *

I opened my eyes and was met with the harsh afternoon sunlight.

_Oww._

I had a massive headache that wouldn't go away.

Now that I was sober, I could feel every aching bone in my body.

"Uggh I'm never going to drink again." I murmured to myself as I rolled away from the sunlight.

"You don't know how happy I am to hear you say that."

I jolted up in bed and my eyes flew open.

Sitting on the edge of my bed, less than two feet away from me was Edward. Once I got over the initial shock of seeing him, I kicked the blankets off my legs and fling self into his arms.

I squeezed my arms around his neck and pressed my face against his.

"What are you doing here?" I cried.

"You had a pretty rough night." He explained as he enveloped me in a hug, "You didn't want to be alone, so I stayed with you to make sure you were okay."

"Thank you." I said.

I would have stayed there in his arms as long as he would have allowed it, but I had a hangover that wouldn't be ignored. Reluctantly, I pulled away from Edward, and climbed out of bed.

I grabbed a bottle of water out of the mini refrigerator next to my desk and excused myself from Edward before going in the bathroom to grab a couple of aspirin out of the medicine cabinet.

Since I was already in the bathroom, I decided I should clean myself up a little bit.

I washed my face and brushed my teeth. I glanced in the mirror as I set my tooth brush down on the sink and that's when I saw the bruises on my neck.

I turned my head from side to side to get a better view of the big purplish bruises. The longer I stared at the bruises the more I started to worry because I couldn't remember how I got them.

"How are you feeling?" Edward asked when I came out of the bathroom.

"Okay… I think—" Other than not being able to remember why I'm covered in bruises. "Hey what happened to your eye?"

There was small cut above his eye that hadn't been there before. I rushed over to Edward and lightly touched my fingers to his face. The skin beneath his eye was slightly swollen.

He gently pulled my hand away from his face and held it in his. His knuckles were swollen as well, and bruised.

"Did you get in a fight?" I asked.

Edward turned my arm over so I could see the bruises on my wrist. I gasped. Then he slid his fingers underneath the bottom of my shirt and touched places on my ribs that felt raw and sore. More bruises I thought.

"I know you didn't want me to, but after I saw this… I had to go back and find him. I didn't have a choice really. I couldn't let James get away with hurting you."

James! The boy from my class did this? I thought he was alright, a little annoying but innocent enough. I racked my brain trying to find some clue to tell me what happened between us that would make him want to do this to me.

I looked at my arm again. I thought I remembered James grabbing it but couldn't remember what happened after. What happened before?

I got in a fight, with Rosalie (a fight which I needed to apologize for later). She walked out on me, then somehow, I was in the room with James, he wouldn't let me leave. I shivered at the memory.

"Are you okay?" Edward asked as he pulled me onto his lap. I could hear the anxiety creeping into his voice.

"Edward what happened last night?"

"I don't know." He responded sadly. "You didn't want to talk about what happened. After I got you in the car you just cried until you fell asleep."

"And then sometime after I fell asleep, you saw my bruises and you drove back to the party to beat up James?"

"Five minutes after you fell asleep." He corrected, "I reached across the seat to put on your seatbelt and as I was buckling you in I saw what he did to your arm. He's damn lucky I didn't see the rest of his damage until after I got you home."

I thought about everything I'd just learned from Edward. There was on thing that didn't quite make sense.

"Why did you help me? I acted like an idiot. I don't think I was very nice to you last night either, and I thought…I thought you were mad at me?"

"I was…but last night put a lot of things in perspective for me. I realized after last night what was important to me. I love you Bella, and I don't want to lose you again."

"Edward," I started, my voice barley about a whisper, "It really happened didn't it? I danced in your arms and you— you really meant all those things you said?"

"Every word."

"What about you and Tanya?" I asked.

"There is no me and Tanya." He declared then he explained how he ended up at the party in the first place. He went for a drive to clear his head because he couldn't stop thinking about me. He didn't realize where he was going until he ended up at Sharon's house.

He wasn't going to stay, but when he weighed being in a room full of drunken strangers against going back home and back to being miserable. He opted for the lesser of the two evils and decided to join the party.

As soon as he stepped inside the house, he regretted it. He thought (hoped) he might run into me, but aside from myself and Rosalie. He didn't expect to see anyone he knew.

Imagine his surprise when he saw Tanya and her group of friends chatting in the living room less than two feet away from him. He turned to leave, but he was too late. Tanya had already spotted him.

"Oh my gosh Edward! It's been so long!" She said, and then dragged him into senseless small talk about the weather, academics, and their few mutual acquaintances.

When she asked him how he was, he was honest. He told her about our break-up and how deeply it affected him. Tanya, according to Edward, had always been a touchy feely type person. When she found out about Edward breaking up with me, she kicked it up a notch.

She felt the need to play the sympathetic ex-girl friend and comfort Edward at every chance she got. She followed him around, hugged him, asked him if he was okay every 30 seconds, and gave him little pecks here and there.

He didn't think anything of it. He was so absorbed by his thoughts that he hardly even registered her presence.

"If I was in my right mind, I would have seen what she was really doing." He didn't realize how "friendly" she had gotten with him until I yelled at him about being superficial and stormed away.

He scolded Tanya for giving everyone the "wrong idea" about them and the rushed to find me so he could explain what happened.

"I never wanted to hurt you Bella." He continued. "I spent the whole night trying to talk to you and trying to make it up to you, but you were so stubborn. Then I thought you would be happy if I let you have your way, so I tried to back off. I tried to think of you as just another girl, but I couldn't, because you weren't just a girl, you were my girl and as soon as I realized that, I knew I was wrong to push you away. I knew I had to fight for you."

By the time he finished his story I was crying, happy tears this time.

"I love you so much." I said, smiling through my tears. "I never meant to hurt you either."

"I know." He said as he kissed my tears away.

"So are we even now?" I asked.

"Even?"

"Yeah…can we forget about all the bad stuff and just start over?"

"Is that what you want?" He asked.

I nodded.

"Okay." He agreed. Then he pulled my face down to his and softly pressed his lips against mine. This kiss was sweet and gentle and everything it should have been. It was the first kiss between Edward and Bella, a couple in love.

_

* * *

_

_A/N: Let me know what you think, please R&R._


	7. Chapter 7

Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters in this story. The link to Bella's top in this chapter is in my profile.

* * *

Last Chapter:

_"I never wanted to hurt you Bella." He continued. "I spent the whole night trying to talk to you and trying to make it up to you, but you were so stubborn. Then I thought you would be happy if I let you have your way, so I tried to back off. I tried to think of you as just another girl, but I couldn't, because you weren't just a girl, you were my girl and as soon as I realized that, I knew I was wrong to push you away. I knew I had to fight for you."_

_By the time he finished his story I was crying, happy tears this time. _

_"I love you so much." I said, smiling through my tears. "I never meant to hurt you either."_

_"I know." He said as he kissed my tears away._

_"So are we even now?" I asked._

_"Even?"_

_"Yeah…can we forget about all the bad stuff and just start over?"_

_"Is that what you want?" He asked._

_I nodded._

_"Okay." He agreed. Then he pulled my face down to his and softly pressed his lips against mine. This kiss was sweet and gentle and everything it should have been. It was the first kiss between Edward and Bella, a couple in love._

* * *

So Edward and I agreed to start things over. And as our first official act of starting over – we took a break.

When I got home from class Monday afternoon, Edward was waiting for me at my door.

I couldn't contain the excitement I felt when I saw him standing there. I dropped my backpack on the floor and ran into his arms.

"Gosh I missed you." I exclaimed as I planted kisses along his jaw.

"I missed you." He responded. He hugged me back and he kissed me.

"How were your classes? Did you think about me as much as I thought about you?" I teased.

"You know I always think about you." He responded.

Something wasn't right.

He was doing all the right stuff and saying all the right things, but every action and every word felt detached.

"What's wrong?" I asked.

"Do you want to go somewhere and talk?"

After I put my things in my room, I led him to a group room on the second floor of the building. I locked us in, then I took a seat at a table across from Edward.

"Okay…" I leaned forward with my elbows on the table and clasped my hands together while I waited for him to speak.

After a moment's hesitation, Edward grabbed my left hand and held it in his while he told me that we should take some time apart.

"Why Edward?! Why would you want to do that when we just got back together. I-I-I thought you loved me?" I gasped through shallow breaths. "I though we worked everything out. Did you change your mind? Did I do something wrong?"

"Bella stop." He ordered as he gently traced circles with his thumb along the back of my hand. I yanked my hand out of his and dropped it under the table.

"You want to see other people." I whispered.

"No! There's only you. That is the one thing, I'm most certain of, I only want to be with you."

"I don't understand."

"Bella, it's not you, you haven't done anything wrong. But this past week has been an emotional train wreck for me. Everything between us happened so fast. In the last 48 hours alone I've gone from being your best friend, to wanting to be your lover, to almost hating you, to falling in love with you again. It's been very intense and very confusing… You said you wanted to start over. Did you mean that?"

I slowly nodded in confirmation.

"Good, because I did too, and for me that means letting go of everything that happened before last night. I can do it, I can let go, but if I try to be with you now while my emotions are still all over the place, I'll just end up pushing you away, and that is the last thing I want to happen. I want to be able to give us a fair chance. There are still so many feelings I need to resolve before I can start over."

"I _don't_ think you would push me away." I argued.

"I don't want to take that chance. I need you to do this for me – you already know I'm not strong enough to stay away from you on my own. I just need some time to clear my head."

"You worry too much." I pouted.

It wasn't fair. I just got him back.

I could refuse to go along with this, even give him an ultimatum if I had to so he would have to stay.

"Please Bella, I promise it will be okay. Just give me this."

I could try and change his mind about this, but I wouldn't. If I was being honest I could admit that I myself had nearly gone mad trying to figure Edward's feelings and where things stood between us these past couple of weeks. I couldn't imagine what he must have gone through, what I must have put him through…

This was my fault and I had to face the consequences for my actions. If he needed time away from me, I didn't see any other choice but to support him and wish for the best.

"How long?" I prompted.

"I don't know." He replied.

"Can I still we still see each other? Can we still talk?"

"It would be better if we didn't."

I expected he would say that, but it still hurt to hear him say it out loud.

It's not the same, I told my self. It's not like last time. You will see him again.

My mind knew the difference, but my body didn't. My entire frame shook and trembled as I tried to suppress the sobs growing inside my chest.

Edward walked around the table, knelt beside my chair and wrapped me in his arms.

"I'll miss you." I said when I could finally speak, "I get so lonely without you."

"Don't be sad love, we'll figure it out as we go."

Edward rose to his feet. He placed his index finger under my chin and tilted my head back. "Never forget," He leaned down to kiss me but hesitated before our lips could touch, "I'll come back to you." He whispered, then he pressed his lips to mine.

I used my time apart from Edward to get closure` on my own unresolved issues, and I started with Rosalie.

I apologized to her for my behavior the night of the party, at least as much of it as I could remember. Rosalie was quick to remind be about all the things I didn't.

"Oh Rose, I'm sorry, you're right I wasn't being fair to you," I exclaimed after she was done retelling the evening from her point of view. "And from the bottom of my heart, I apologize that I took you for granted. I'm not perfect. I have been selfish… but, I won't apologize for that, not when it comes to Edward. Although I could have been more—_what is the word I'm looking for…level headed, rational, sober_—' graceful', I don't regret anything that I did that night, because it brought him back to me."

Rosalie stared at me in silence.

I knew that any chance I had of her accepting my apology would be shot to hell with that last comment about Edward but I wouldn't take it back. It was truly how I felt, and I was trying something new these days called honesty.

I didn't expect Rosalie to forgive me, so I was stunned when she got up and hugged me. "I think I finally found the one thing we have in common." She whispered. "What is it about those boys that makes us want to throw all our common sense out the window?"

I couldn't help myself. I started laughing, and Rosalie laughed too.

I'll never forget that day. It was the day Rosalie and I finally found the one thing that brought us together, our undying love for our men.

Rosalie and I got along much better after that. We would never be best friends. I would never be the most significant person in Rosalie's life and she would never be the most important person in mine, but now that we finally understood the true nature of our relationship, we were okay with that.

Thursday morning I woke up with a dreadful feeling in the pit of my stomach. As I was getting dressed for class I understood why.

I had lab this afternoon, I would have to see James again.

I looked at the bruises on my arm, which had now faded to a sickly greenish color and thought about skipping the class.

I eventually decided against it.

Edward told me what he could remember about what I'd done at the party, but I still had so many questions.

What happened when James and I were alone together? All I could remember was him grabbing me. I assumed we got into a fight. I didn't think there could be any other explanation, but it wasn't impossible that things happened differently than I imagined. What if I got the bruises some other way? What if we hooked up?

I shuddered at the thought. The realization hit me then that if I had questions about my involvement with James, Edward must too.

Was this one of the feelings he needed to resolve? Did he think we slept together?

I was more determined than ever to find out what happened.

I was thoroughly disappointed when James didn't show for class.

The week after, I almost missed him. He walked in to lab wearing a pair of dark oversized shades. Even with his disguise, I could still see that most of his face was the same sickly green color my wrist had been the week before.

James walked right past me to get to his seat and he didn't acknowledge me at all.

I caught up with him after class was over. "James!" I yelled as I chased him out of the building.

Edward would have a fit if he knew I was seeking out James. After what he did to you?! Have you lost your mind?! He's dangerous?! I could practically hear Edward scolding me as I got closer and closer to James. Fortunately we were "on a break" and his opinion on the subject didn't matter at the moment.

"What do you want from me?" James growled.

"You don't have to be rude!" I said angrily, "I want to know what happened that night. You owe me an explanation."

"Look," he said, "I promised your boyfriend I would stay away from you! It's like I told him, nothing happened!"

That wasn't good enough. 'Nothing' didn't clear up anything for me. I needed details for myself and for Edward. We both needed closure.

"Nothing doesn't explain the bruises all over my body." I said sarcastically.

"I'm sorry for that. I was drinking."

"Do you remember?"

"Yeah."

"James." I gasped. "All I want is the truth. Whatever happened—I'm not going to use it against you, no matter what it is."

"Are you going to tell him?"

"Yes…" I hesitantly responded. It would be so much easier to tell him Edward would never find out, but I didn't want to lie anymore, not even to James. "but he isn't going to come after you again. Edward loves me and he wouldn't do anything to lose me. If he fights with you again, he will." Not because I particularly fond of James, but because once was enough. Edward made his point.

We could never have a future together if we continued to dwell on the past, and James was the past.

"I just want to move on." I told him.

James sighed, defeated. "I'm agreeing to this because I'd like to move on too, and I can't do that if I have to be constantly looking over my shoulder."

I nodded in agreement. James was giving me what I asked for with the expectation that he wouldn't have to worry about Edward coming after him again.

"I liked you and I thought you felt the same way I did. so I was being a little more persistent than you may have been comfortable with— okay a lot more—I grabbed you, I tried to force you, but you fought me off. I didn't even get to kiss you."

James pulled down the collar on his shirt to show me the marks I'd left on his neck, then he took off his glasses.

Both of his eyes were bruised to the point they were nearly black. His right eye was a raw pink color and swollen shut.

"My gosh." I whispered.

"I have you to thank for the eye." James commented as he fixed his glasses back on his face.

I believed him. Any doubts I had were whipped out of my mind. I was 100 percent sure that nothing had happened between me and James. I would make sure Edward was convinced too.

Without saying another word, James slung his backpack over his shoulder and walked away.

* * *

I'd been almost four weeks (three weeks, five days, and 4 and a half hours to be exact) since we started this break and tonight I was absolutely restless.

I'd done a good job so far. I was missing Edward like crazy, but I gave him his space. I wrote him once after I'd talked to James, hoping that knowing what I knew would help Edward put his mind at ease.

He didn't write back.

I didn't email him anymore after that. I didn't call him. I didn't even run over to his apartment like I wanted to do so many times.

I was all for being the supportive girlfriend, but even I had my limits. It was 6 30 on a Saturday night and I didn't want to be alone. Edward didn't say we couldn't see each other, just that it would be better if we didn't.

Ten minutes couldn't hurt. Besides, the other day when I was cleaning out my closet, I found a sweatshirt that was much too big to be mine. It might belong to Edward (Or Emmett, or Rosalie, but that was beyond the point). The point was it was getting cooler outside, and if it was Edward's sweatshirt he would need it.

It was settled. I needed to see Edward to return his sweatshirt. If it's not his, then no harm done.

I peeled off the t-shirt I currently had on and replaced it with a midnight blue lace v-neck camisole. I originally bought it to wear as an undershirt. The gaps in the lace didn't leave much to the imagination and that was the look I was going for.

I changed out of my sweatpants and pulled on a pair of dark denims jeans and heels.

I curled my hair and let it hang loosely down my back. I dabbed on some eye-liner and lip gloss. When I was done I looked more suited for a night out with Rosalie than to make a trip to Edward's apartment.

I knocked on his door twice before it flew open. It was like the first time I saw him all over again. My heart was pounding against my chest. There were a million butterflies flocking inside my stomach.

Edward's eyes roamed over by body, taking in my appearance. He grabbed my hand and pulled me inside.

"My Gawd!" He exclaimed.

As soon as the door to his apartment clicked shut, Edward's mouth was on mine. I dropped the stupid sweatshirt on the ground so that I could secure both of my arms around his neck.

Without breaking the kiss Edward lifted me in his arms. I hooked my legs around his waist while he carried me to his room.

We fell onto his bed and continued kissing until our lungs burned from lack of oxygen.

"Amazing." He sighed once he caught his breath. "Simply exquisite."

"What?" I panted.

"You." He smiled as he ran his fingers through my hair. "I've missed you."

Our break was officially over.

We spent the rest of that weekend, and every weekend thereafter together at his apartment, kissing and talking, and getting to know each other again.

Edward and I were truly together with no lies, no questions, no doubts between us. We were happy, enjoying each other in life and love.

* * *

The End.


End file.
